I have been training really good for this Ironman. I have been performing, it’s all great. But for some reason this week, I am having a hard time with it. I feel like it has taken over my life completely. I only have like 7 weeks to go but I am struggling. I guess it’s summer, I am single, all these outdoor activities, parties… I went out some, trying to socialize, but I am in by 9 because I have a 6 hours brick the next day. Somehow I feel like I am missing out on something. It is so late in the game, maybe it’s just normal to feel this way… I am tired, have a hard time concentrating at work, but hey, training is going great… How do you guys find balance? Or is it just harder because I am single? Or hard because this is the tough training part? I probably know the answers to my questions, but i guess I needed to vent and see if anyone else was going thru this right now!
Guess what! It is time to start resting. I will admit that I am not an Ironman (nor do I plan to be in the near future), however, the signs you are stating are my indicators that I am slightly overtrained and I need to start to rest a little - both mentally and physically. Usually if I start the downward descent for my taper at this point I will reach the race at my ideal point. I always started to hate swimming and training about a month before a major meet. When I tried to swim through it and get one more week of hard training in, I usually got an injury or never got my energy levels recovered in time. When I started my taper at this point, I recovered, avoided injury and had some of my best races.
My work colleague and teammate is going through this right now, too, in preparation for IMCDA. He says he feels tired all the time and has trouble concentrating, and it’s having an impact on his relationship with his girlfriend, who is relatively new in his life and probably didn’t realize what Ironman training would involve when this whole thing started. We have talked about it quite a bit and he is thinking that it is just the stress of these hard weeks, and things will get better, even during the taper. The thing is, IM training really is out of balance, at least the last build phase is, and if we know it will end soon, we can usually get through most things. I don’t think it is harder either single or involved, each presents different challenges. People in relationships (may) feel some guilt about not giving those relationships enough time; people who are single may feel too alone, and missing out, as you said. It’s good that your training is still going great, so it isn’t an overtraining issue per se. I really hope that like my colleague, you’ll begin to see the sun come out as you taper down for your event, and then really take the race by storm knowing you’ve done your best to prepare. I wish you the best!
I wondered the same thing last year. I’m single, etc. You just about described how I felt last year. Even got a bit depressed about it to. I went to a wedding of a good friend and had to ride 100 miles in the morning before I drove down and then ran 18 miles the morning of. Doesn’t make for a real fun wedding when you are exhausted. I don’t know the answer to how you deal with it. I just plowed ahead. Life with friends begins again after the big event. ANd it is only about 6 weeks of total time that the training, eating, sleeping, trying to work really takes a toll. Training becomes your second job. You just have to get through it to get to the big goal that IRONMAN. Fortunatly, most of your friends are waiting for you at the other end of the race and welcoming back into the fun. And they will think your crazy for what you did.
Don’t know if that helps but I’ve been there. A bunch of us have. Good Luck! You are almost there.
Welcome to the world of Ironman, Marisol. “Ready now, for training you are” sayeth YodaTriBriGuy. . .
Seriously. . .THIS is part of the Ironman experience. It is part of what Ironman gives to you for the rest of your life. Ironman is NOT only about that day and getting from point A to B. That, in many ways, is the reward for submitting to the Iron discipline.
This is the time where you have to trust in your coach (if you have one), and/or your plan. It will not be easy, and will probably get tougher before it lets up. . . Rest assured, however, that if you’ve properly planned your Ironman training, it WILL let up.
Ironman is about sacrifice. You cannot live what the rest of the population deems a “balanced” life. Something has to give. . .job, social life, family. . .something. . . Personally, that is why I do not do them year in/year out. I’ve done 3. I’ll do more. But long term balance in my life demands other facets of life take center stage at times. But once you’ve taken the decision to complete an Ironman. . .something will give. . .It sounds like your personal life has taken a hit. . .And so it has. Experience that loss. Experience it along with the gain of your disciplined daily training. Understand what you are really accomplishing. . .not just what you’ve gained, but what you’ve lost at the same time. That is the whole of the experience.
Hell, if the Ironman experience were easy. . .we couldn’t find a race course large enough to allow the 20,000 entrants per event like some of the large marathons and 10ks have. . . No, Ironman is different. It sucks the life out of you on the way, in return for presenting you with a much richer life in the end.
So. . .suffer if you must, but experience these toughest weeks of training in their fullness. Glory in it. . .you MAY never have the opportunity to visit this area of life again.
Above all, understand that just about 100% of IM athletes experience these same feelings. . .Those of us who have been down this road are with you, silently cheering and pulling you on. . .
Thanks you guys… It does help… Sometimes I feel like I am wrapped up in my own bubble, the only one feeling this way. I should be greatful that my training is great, I guess sacrifices are part of training for an Ironman… Doesn’t mean it’s easy. I envy the married people for the support they get but I bet they envy me at times for the freedom of training… Always greener on the other side! But thanks for the support, it’s really nice!
I’m in training for IMC, my first Ironman, which is still some three months away (Oh My God - 90 Days, I need/want more time!) Anyway, started my training last November and am in my 27 th week, i.e. just over 6 months. I had a bit of a lull, particularly after a marathon I did at the end of April. It is hard to keep on the training day in and day out. I took the lull for what it was and viewed it as a glass half full. A number of online sites talk about taking a break/rest in the training for an IM because of the long time frame, and I rationionized away. Mentally, I think it was just getting a little old. It sort of related to mile 24 of the marathon for newbies. You’ve been running for forwever and by that point it seems like you will continue to run for forever. The mind looses a little touch with reality. More experience (at least in marathons) overcomes this. I hope it is the same with IM. I am now back at it full bore for the last three weeks. It helps that I finally did my first tri of the year this past Saturday. I am happy to add that IM training and conditioning make for a heck of an improvement over last year. As far as significant others goes, I have a terrific wife of three years. She talked me onto going for a P3 instead of the P2k even though she doesn’t compete let alone train for tris, running or cycling (she is one heck of a power yogist, but I am digressing). For all of her support and approval, the training is taking a toll. I think I would find it difficult to do this every year, at least at the level I would want to perform at. SO, I think you kind of hit it on the head, being unattached has its benefits as well as drawbacks. Besides, IM training alone is not necessarily why you are currently unattached. Finding someone worth the effort is a difficult proposition under any circumstance. If you don’t believe me, just ask Tom D. 
I can totally relate on both IM training and being single. Although I’m sure it’s just as hard for the married folks in different ways, the single training is hard. I feel like I’m overwhelmed because there is no one else to mow the lawn, walk the dog who doesn’t get the whole “long bike” concept, do the dishes, do the laundry, etc. You’re the soul support.
But TriBriGuy said it…it will be well worth the effort. Well worth it. If this is your first IM, you will be amazed. I cannot believe how many people in my life introduce me as “…blah blah. She’s an Ironman.” The sense of personal accomplishment is so worthwhile. And your friends and family will be very proud and will understand your early nights (or no nights) out and will appreciate your time that much more when you’re back in the summer evening fun.
Hang in there and keep us posted!! Congrats on all the hard training.
~geek
Let me start by saying, I’ve never done an Ironman.
I’d really recomend, do a post search for for
“Depression of the Athlete” it has some pretty good (if I do say so myself) insight on this.
For those who don’t feel like looking for it I’ll try and summerize it.
Marisol, I know just about exactly how you feel. I pretty much did that last year. I burned some bridges, my training fell apart, and I had a lousey time.
Personally I’d recommend taking a two or three day training break. Don’t stop training all together, but cut down milage a little bit. Do something fun in the time you save, see what happens.
Your sport should be your hobby, not your life, lose sight of this and things go down hill fast. (And not in a good sort of way.)
-It’s a beautiful day, don’t let it get away- U2.
if you want to read about others’… here’s an interesting bit about Greame Obree’s life and times…
http://www.bike.com/template.asp?date=5%2F19%2F2004&lsectionnumber=4
A friend of mine did IM… didn’t want to touch her bike for weeks after that. (Guess that marks the re-start of social life, in a way…)
My take on this… Had a similar thing happening last year, lots of training, obsessing over the regimen, no eating this, no drinking that, no staying up - bad for recovery, bad for legs, etc… No time for friends, no time for work even. Whole life centered around the sport, and I became rather depressed. I finished the season, and didn’t touch the bike for a long time after that. Just rested, worked, socialized. Only started riding when it was fun again… and only for fun (that is, no HRMs, no bike computer, no watch…). Gradually, the competetive urge started coming back (still on its way 
). I’m also gradually getting sick of all the socializing. Still do it, but will try to do less of it. It’s a bit of a cycle with me.
On being single… I kinda think that being single is better, if you’re trying to train hard, or go headlong into something, not to mention doing something like the IM. Lots of athletes become obsessive, compulsive, selfish and depressive. And methinks we need to go through a cycle or two (again, especially if it’s a big goal, like the IM) to get used to the process, before being able to change anything about it. I try to remember that life takes decades, and that I can probably afford a year or two to learn
-M
I’ve also been down this road…everytime I train for an ironman. I’ve done 13 ironman in five years. My girlfriend is obviously fairly patient with me. The trick is…you just have to keep training for the race, and then rest when it’s done. If you have to, break up your training for a few days. Don’t do anything dangerous or risky to your race shape, but a mountain bike ride instead of the endless road…whatever. Find training buddies who have a sympathetic ear. Try to stay focussed and positive. After all, no one makes you do it.
I guess I have been thinking about this… I am in the best shape of my life, and I really like that. I think what got me is when I signed up for my half IM in june (to prepare for LP) and I have to go by myself. It was like a huge hit in the face, made me feel so lonely. I then wish I had a significant other and that reminded me on how I haven’t been socializing… Chain reaction… I guess I wish I had someone to do all this with. I miss that a lot. But then, when the opportunities come, it’s never good enough. It’s like I have these high standards that might not be realistic. Unless the guy is handsome, successful AND a triathlete (and doesn’t live with his parents), I am not interested… Am I too picky or what? That IS what I want… I guess I am just venting. This site is really good. I love it. Triathletes that are going thru the same things giving you feedback…
Unless the guy is handsome, successful AND a triathlete (and doesn’t live with his parents), I am not interested… Am I too picky or what? That IS what I want
Post your picture and I bet we can get some volunteers, it could be like ST Bachlorette;) Just Kidding. Seriously, the advice here is good and that guy will find you just be patient and relax. Have fun and enjoy the experience now. An old friend of mine used to tell me all the time that I should enjoy today because it is the only today I get and then it is gone forever. I hated it when she would tell me that but just because it was so true. Good Luck with the IM!
Oddly enough I have been thinking the same thing. I got into Tin Man 1/2 yesterday…kinda scares me as I feel like I am not in shape, though I know I am. After all the years of playing this game, I think back and can pretty much remember a time every year where I would wonder “Why am I doing this”? I have kind of seen it all from injury, shitty diagnosis, to my training partner killing himself one tuesday morning. We all need to get past that and go forward. Just remember…there is nothing like getting to that finish line - nothing…does not matter if you get there in 8 hours or 17 hours…there is nothing like it.
No, you’re not too picky. That’s just knowing what you want. Absolutely nothing wrong with that, especially the part where he doesn’t live with his parents!
I can relate to your comments about doing the race without a significant other. Having been on both sides of that deal, sometimes it’s more of a hassle having a S.O. around that kind of gets in the way. Getting stupid questions like “why do you have to wake up two hours before the race time?” can really irk you when you’re thinking about race prep. Yes, I actually had an ex-girlfriend ask me that. Like others have said, it cuts both ways and it does always look greener on the other side.
Try to stay focused on the fact that participation in the triathlon lifestyle is part of what makes you, you. To the right guy, that is a huge attraction. It can be a lonely lifestyle at times but I always remind myself that those feelings are only temporary.
BTW, what 1/2IM are you signed up for? Go out and have a great time, then treat yourself by spending some extra time with friends.
“Post your picture and I bet we can get some volunteers, it could be like ST Bachlorette;)” I like that idea, imagine the pool of guys I have to choose from in here! I should do an auction:)The only problem is that they are probably not local!
See the problem about your exgirlfriend asking why you get up 2 hours before doesn’t exist when you are dating a triathlete… I signed up for Effingham, june 27, in preparation for lake Placid. Lake Placid will be great because I will have family and friends there, I am very lucky for that:)
First, I can say I’m a 2 x IM so I know wassup with you…The first one I was single, the second one in a relationship. Fortunately it was a supportive relationship, I was very lucky. It was probably easier to do it in a relationship, only because I didn’t feel the need to “make the scene” and go out hunting late at night with friends. On the other hand, I didn’t feel guilty falling into bed at 8pm when I was single.
Now, do you really want a guy who doesn’t appreciate what it is you are doing and why you chose to make this sacrifice? And yes, you do have high standards in others because you have them in yourself. That is healthy, not negative. I’ve never dated another triathlete, but found that women who are active or athletes in some other sport understand your training and dedication. Couch potatoes who would rather stay out all night and watch TV all day while eating KFC will not understand you, that’s reality.
Yes, IM training weeks suck, but in the end your IM will give you confidence like you’ve never had before. It will carry over to other areas of your life. Feel fortunate that you have discovered this and are able to go down this path. You will forever set yourself apart from the normal human being. Also, on race day, look around. All those thousands of people went through the same thing. Also, probably a bunch of fit, single people there just like you as well! KEEP HAMMERING!!!
“…and I have to go by myself. It was like a huge hit in the face, made me feel so lonely. I then wish I had a significant other and that reminded me on how I haven’t been socializing…” Wow - that could have come straight out of my diary after I went by myself to columbia last weekend. the race was great but then at the end, with all the families and stuff… Still, i did get pasta salad with peter reid so that cheered me up a bit. I feel the same sometimes, that I wish I had someone to do this with, although the “this” is not only triathlon, but life in general. i have met some nice people that do triathlons in dc but only one guy, my training partner, who really takes it as seriously as i do. but i am trying to become more of a part of the local tri team, and maybe that might be a good way for you too to socialize while you train.
I’d ask you out on a date but my mom won’t let me stay out past 9.
the other thing that consoles me is that when i see people crammed into sweaty smoke-filled bars and drinking beer after beer as i go home to bed i really don’t envy them too much.
It’s like I have these high standards that might not be realistic. Unless the guy is handsome, successful AND a triathlete (and doesn’t live with his parents), I am not interested… Am I too picky or what? That IS what I want… <<
NO! You are not too picky! I have the same requirements, though would also add cyclist in there and handsome/successful are defined differently by each person. My dad told me once, “Better to be too picky rather than not picky enough.”
Do you have a bunch of other tri folk you train with? That’s my social crowd, plus a few “normal” people, but they know that my time is limited during the big training time. I’m now setting up lunches, dinners, etc. with people that I’ve put off the past couple of months.
As for going to the race solo–that might work to your benefit! If there are any Slowtwitchers there, definitely plan to meet up with them. I had a ball hanging out and talking to the crew up at CaliMan. We DO have some hottie boys in our midst.
You will rock LP!
clm
I feel the same way often. All my friends are going out partying, supposedly having fun. I used to do that but don’t much often now b/c it really isn’t fun. It is a very alluring prospect, and eveyone going out will make it seem like the best time in the world, most of the time it’s not. I was invited to party all weekend at Party Cove in the Lake of the Ozarks, and it sounds fun, but I’ll get more out of a long ride and run.
Then when I reach my goals at Worlds’ I’ll have a sense of accomplishment and pride, something you don’t get from going out and partying. It’s like my college coach said, “you’ve got the rest of your life to drink and act stupid, do something worthwhile while you’re here.” I regret not listening now. On the single aspect, I’m single, and it does look nice to see people with SO’s, but remember you are only seeing the good side and the image couples put on when they go out. It’s not all roses, and it’s really hard to date and do well in this sport.
Anyways, I was getting cranky like you, now I’m sick, so like Yarf wrote, you may be overtraining a little, that’s what happened to me. Now I’ve got a mandatory couple of days off, which sucks. If any of that makes sense? Must be the antibiotics