Excellent piece, Dan! This is what makes this site so special. Technical information, yes, but also real life information.
Well, you threw down the gauntlet about sharing our stories, so here’s mine (in summary: I could eat up most of your server space with the details):
My girlfriend got pregnant a few months before she graduated from college. We got married. Lived with my parents for several months. First daughter born in August, second daughter born the following July (what can I say…). Through our marriage, I have struggled with the classic “what-do-I-want-to-be-when-I-grow-up” syndrome. I went from sales (which I hated) to computer work (which is what I do now, but without much fulfillment), but in between took firefighter tests in three cities, considered law school and took the LSAT, and very seriously considered going in to the ministry (surprise!). Needless to say, this was difficult on my wife. It seemed like I was only concerned with me, but at the same time, I figured if I was happy, then my family would be happy.
Oh, yeah, I played baseball, too. That was what defined me: I was a ballplayer. I took it so seriously that my family life suffered (sound familiar, anyone?). The nadir of my obsession occurred one night when my wife and kids came to a game. They had stopped at a store on the way and my oldest daughter had accidentally kicked a door and torn off most of her big toenail. My dad stopped by the field to tell me that they had gone to a nearby hospital to have it looked at. In hindsight, I should have dropped everything and gone to be with them. I didn’t. Hey, I was the captain and the shortstop and, anyway it’s “only” a toenail, no big deal, right? Right?? Wrong. I have never, NEVER regretted anything in my life as much as that. The thought of my daughter asking “Where’s Daddy?” and me playing a GAME instead of being with her still tears me up.
Anyhow, I stopped playing baseball two years ago because it took too much time away from my family, even more than triathlon does, believe it or not. At least with triathlon, I can control my own schedule, as opposed to being beholden to a team.
To bring this to a point, I have realized that my family (next to my faith) is THE most important thing in my life, and that whatever individual desires I have must work within the context of my family. Sacrifice is just a part of being married. Now, because of my sinfulness, I don’t always adhere to that standard, but as I stated in the other thread, I strive for it.
My wife and I know that God has blessed us with many things. Sometimes we lose sight of these blessings, or take them for granted, but by studying the Bible regularly, praying and staying very involved in our church, we are continually reminded of His wonderful love for us. We also know that, while the road may not always smooth, even for faithful Christians (ref: Job), God will ALWAYS be there to guide us.
Although I like to think of myself as a “triathlete”, that title falls somewhere down the line after “Christian”, “Husband” and “Father”.
(Thanks again, Dan, for providing a forum where the “aerodynamics” of our lives can be discussed along with all the other accoutrements of our sport.)