This is my microwave. It belonged to an ex-girlfriend’s parents. My wife wants a new one but this one detonates burritos better than any microwave at 7-11.
Here’s Pepsi. She’s crazy because she came from a box by the railroad tracks.
This is my thumb. I have another one, but this one is the best.
This is my home theatre. Its fuse blew out during a lightening storm and I replaced it with a drywall screw. It still works but sometimes it smells like burning hair.
Here’s my dog, Jones. He eats tennis balls and then gets sad because his stomach hurts.
I guess my plant is pretty cool. Max (see below) likes to eat it.
This is Max. He’s reppin’ 801, west-side. My buddy found him hustling the streets after losing a fight with a moving car tire. Totally gangsta (he even walks with a limp).
Were you in the middle of ironing?
And why are there cloths all ove your bed?
Give your wife a huge suprise, finish ironing all the cloths, hang them up, buy a new microwave, get a sitter for the pets and then take your speechless wife out to dinner and report back to kittycat’s thread.
Judging solely from the appearance of your thumb, you appear to have decent hygiene. It appears clean, with a well-trimmed nail. I think the microwave is indicative of deeper relationship issues. Your wife resent’s it because it is a link to your ex-girlfriend. You may be attached to it for that reason. You should see a therapist trained in appliance retention areas.
Dude… the reflection on the TV screen of the rest of your room!
And yeah, that calico cat gonna start climbing curtains… soon; get some therapy for the dog he looks depressed; and don’t turn your back on the black cat… he’s gonna pop a cap on someone in the house pretty quickly… trust me.
LOL, that was the funniest. thing. ever. I am laughing so hard the cube gophers are all staring at me and I have mascara smeared all over my face now.
As for your life, Requiem for a Dream says “I like to live on the wild side, I like it a bit rough” but Independence Day says “I’m a sheep who follows the crowds, and that Will Smith, he’s jiggy!”
Old school microwaves are the best. I love talking on my cordless phone while I’m using mine, the thing leaks microwaves so badly that the QoS falls thru the floor. Good way to ditch telemarketers.
I think you need to examine why it is that you prefer your left thumb. is it because the right thumb has some deformity? Do you have issues with disabled people? And if it is because of lack of use if the left thumb, aren’t you then trying to compensate for the lack of use by giving it a superfluous title of “best”? Is it because your mother is left-handed? Is this, then, some hidden form of Oedipal complex?
I think this preference for the left thumb is really masking some deeper emotional issues… It would be worth it to explore these issues by asking the “why”…
;^)
Lol… That was one of the best posts I’ve seen in a long time.
