Brian Nichols... This just in (This is HUGE)

Brian Nichols has apparently taken a dump…
Witnesses report seeing him enter a mens room…
More as story develops…

Stay with Conspiracy News Network…
We update you on the Nichols story every 30 seconds…
Other networks only update every 60 seconds…

So maybourne, please explain how we can have 24/7 coverage of every little detail of every supposed story, and yet the media still misses the story behind important events essentially every time.

Start talking about anything more substantial than idle gossip, and the american public’s eyes do a collective glaze-over.

The media is a business, they don’t really exist to inform us, only to draw enough viewers to bring in ad revenue.

I have to admit, good answer, at least the last part. I am a bit more optimistic about the first part though.

Yah, what’s Martha Stewart doing right now?

Probably one of her house maids. (rimshot.)