Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday

Nov 30, 07 8:44

Post #1 of 71 (16993 views)

So I am swimming my laps before spin class, figured I could get in about 2000 and still dry off in time to get a bike. I am in lanes 1, 2 and 3 altering lanes on each lenth. In lane 4 is a woman of large mass who is water walking to the best of her abilities - god bless her man, she is trying right? At any rate I am watching her walk as I am swimming...just then I notice a Jacuzzi stream of bubbles ejecting from the rear of her suit. This was more than I could take....did another 25yds and walked stunned to spin class....

Uhhhhh.....gross.

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 8:47

Post #2 of 71 (16975 views)

I think she was trying to communicate with you...

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Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 8:50

Post #3 of 71 (16950 views)

"I am in lanes 1, 2 and 3 altering lanes on each lenth"

I've farted many times, both in and out of the pool. But i've never alternated lanes for many reasons. Looking like an idiot is one.

I love triathletes.

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 8:51

Post #4 of 71 (16933 views)

I'm sure I'm reading this wrong but, you alternate lanes on each lenght? Are there lane lines and even not why?

Styrrell

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [eganski] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 8:52

Post #5 of 71 (16933 views)

In Reply To:

"I am in lanes 1, 2 and 3 altering lanes on each lenth"

I've farted many times, both in and out of the pool. But i've never alternated lanes for many reasons. Looking like an idiot is one.

I love triathletes.

I cant count! Down the pool and back is 200yds. I only do it when the pool is empty (and it always is at the new gym!)

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 8:56

Post #6 of 71 (16896 views)

So let me see if I have this right. You're swimming in all 3 lanes because you can't count, in a pool that's 100 yards long (if down and back is 200 yards).

and you think an old woman farting is "phreaky"?

Got it.

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [eganski] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:00

Post #7 of 71 (16859 views)

I am completely confused. I've never seen a 100 yard pool OR someone moving from lane to lane to lane in 20 years of swimming!!

.

"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:01

Post #8 of 71 (16855 views)

If you're checking someone out that hard in the lane next to you, your form is going to get all messed up.... ...you've got to concentrate when you're swimming, try using the other head...

(for all the serious types, this post was made in jest)

There are three kinds of people, those who can count, and those who can't.

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [eganski] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:01

Post #9 of 71 (16852 views)

I'm with Eganski. I really don't think it's that gross, especially considering every now and again you (the royal "you") see a very pregnant woman swimming. Think about those possibilities and it's corresponding grossness factor, and an old woman farting in the pool doesn't seem that bad to me.

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Existence precedes Essence.

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:02

Post #10 of 71 (16839 views)

So gals, I'm an older woman who has been trying my very best to lose some weight. So I'm in the pool today, water walking, and some guy is alternating across all 4 lanes. He was driving me crazy. I didn't know what to do. Anyway, I squeezed out a little "poot" and the guy bailed. Now I know what to do next time! So as I'm leaving, I notice he's in spin class. After every 5 minutes, he jumps off his bike and gets on the one to the left. He does this thru the entire class. True Story. ;)

Elsie

3SIXTY5cycling.com

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:04

Post #11 of 71 (16821 views)

If farting in the pool is enough to gross you out and chase you from the water, don't read the other threads regarding bodily functions and the pool. Some have indicated that they relieve themselves at every workout.

Maybe you should invest in an endless pool to cure your counting issues, and the issues you have with people farting.

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:04

Post #12 of 71 (16821 views)

boy, this thread didn't turn out quite like you hoped, huh?

Last edited by: BillyJ: Nov 30, 07 9:06

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [BillyJ] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:06

Post #13 of 71 (16801 views)

In Reply To:

boy, this thread didn't turn out like you hope, huh?

This is ST - they never do. Cant take back my sick feeling however. Sure everyone farts...I just dont want to hear OR SEE it!

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [hillier99] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:08

Post #14 of 71 (16793 views)

Well, did he have a heart-rate monitor strap, a watch bigger than what Flava Flav would wear on his chest, a murky looking energy drink (because we all know triathletes can't work out for longer than 30 minutes without an energy drink) in a bottle that said "xxx 70.3" or "Ironman USA Lake Placid", a swim suit with chamois in it, and a swim cap that said "Rockman Half Ironman" on it?

yep, you've had an encounter with a species known as "Triathlete."

If I were you, I would've started "baking brownies" in the lane next to him. That would've scared him off. I've heard that some triathletes think it's strange that old women fart.

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [eganski] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:12

Post #15 of 71 (16760 views)

Nope! It was a RockMan water bottle (filled with a RedBull Heed combo). I would never EVER carry a 70.3 bottle, 140.6 bottles are the ONLY bottles I will be seen in public with - other than one of my 50+ Rockman bottles. Swim cap has IRONMAN written on it in black Sharpie. ;-P

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [hillier99] [ In reply to ]

Smil'n Hawaiian

Nov 30, 07 9:21

Post #16 of 71 (16718 views)

Quote:

So gals, I'm an older woman who has been trying my very best to lose some weight. So I'm in the pool today, water walking, and some guy is alternating across all 4 lanes. He was driving me crazy. I didn't know what to do. Anyway, I squeezed out a little "poot" and the guy bailed. Now I know what to do next time! So as I'm leaving, I notice he's in spin class. After every 5 minutes, he jumps off his bike and gets on the one to the left. He does this thru the entire class. True Story. ;)

This made me laugh so hard that I farted in my office. I'm pretty sure R10C was watching me, so he ended up leaving... :)

Chris
*****************************

Chris
*********************
“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!”
― Hunter S. Thompson,

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:26

Post #17 of 71 (16690 views)

Quote:

Sure everyone farts...I just dont want to hear OR SEE it!

Hmmm. I'd rather see or hear it than SMELL it.

''The enemy isn't conservatism. The enemy isn't liberalism. The enemy is bulls**t.''

—Lars-Erik Nelson

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [chitide1] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:39

Post #18 of 71 (16636 views)

Yuo never did snake sets? They were the mostest funnest thing outside of water polo or sharks & minnows.

Dive from the blocks in lane 1, go 25 butterfly
Depending on coach's whim, either open turn and push off, ducking under the lane line into lane 2, or get out and dive into lane 2
25 backstroke in lane 2
transition to lane 3
25 breaststroke in lane 3
transition to lane 4
25 freestyle
transition to lane 5
25 underwater
transition to lane 6
25 choice of stroke

Repeat 3-4 times, in between each snake, you either ran the bleachers (indoor pool) or ran around the pool and parking lot (outdoor pool in the summer)

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [FLA Jill] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:44

Post #19 of 71 (16598 views)

Nah - never did!! I found that I had some pretty hard a** coaches in my competitive years - even when I was really young - a game of sharks and minnoes was rare - so deprived......

I think that most "creative fun" I had at practive was, ummm, well....... nevermind........ can't think of anything.....

/

"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [FLA Jill] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 9:47

Post #20 of 71 (16576 views)

Exactly...there have been times at the Y where there would be 5-6 of us doing that, minus the running. Usually late at night when regular folks dont want to be in the pool.

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 10:00

Post #21 of 71 (16509 views)

On this one, it was your fault. By alternating lanes, you swam into her stream of wet-farts. You invaded her territory.

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 10:14

Post #22 of 71 (16460 views)

You see all types at the pool and in the locker room. Everyone has their own idiosyncracies ......

_____________________________________________
Rick, "Retired" hobbyist athlete
Trying to come back slowly from acute A-Fib

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 10:16

Post #23 of 71 (16440 views)

In Reply To:

In Reply To:

boy, this thread didn't turn out like you hope, huh?

This is ST - they never do. Cant take back my sick feeling however. Sure everyone farts...I just dont want to hear OR SEE it!

You should be thankful. In some countries that is a way of saying hello.

________________
Adrian in Vancouver

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [Danno] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 10:24

Post #24 of 71 (16390 views)

Hmmm. I'd rather see or hear it than SMELL it.

Hmmm. I'd rather smell it than TASTE it.

Re: Worst thing ever ever seen in the pool - true story...Phreaky Pfriday [AJHull] [ In reply to ]

Nov 30, 07 10:31

Post #25 of 71 (16359 views)

[reply]
[reply]
[reply]
boy, this thread didn't turn out like you hope, huh?[/reply]
This is ST - they never do. Cant take back my sick feeling however. Sure everyone farts...I just dont want to hear OR SEE it![/reply]
[#0000bf]You should be thankful. In some countries that is a way of saying hello.[/#0000bf][/reply]

Just ask my wife, she'll tell you thats my way of saying 'good morning'

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Fight............Finish

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