If you are on any kind of social media, you know the 'profamateur' genus.
-They have few (or no) real sponsors, but they like to imply that they do...e.g. they @ reply brands even if they pay retail for the product. #simplyfaster -- except that you're slow, and Cervelo doesn't sponsor you.
-They have impossibly high opinions of themselves, and issue glamorous training selfies with unreal regularity. #timetrialtuesday -- here's a question: how much time did you spend setting up your iPhone for that profile shot?
-They typically don't adult or career in any sense...they are either family-moneyed enough to train all day and jetset around the world, dwelling in temperate climates year round, or they run a "full time coaching business" and act like they are some kind of wildly gifted young entrepreneur. #30under30 -- hey bud, news flash: three or four fat, 14 hour Iron-dentist clients do not make you a professional services company
-They are not fast enough to act this important.
There are at least three species:
By way of example, one joke of an elite card holder -- he is slower than me, and I am maybe half an hour (in 70.3) too slow for a discounted Fuji -- just launched his own clothing line. I can't make this up. The clothing is utterly hideous, and the brand has its own social media accounts -- and is has, of course, its own hash tag. #bedisruptive
Wow. Are these the douchiest species' in all of sports? Absolutely intolerable. I have opted for pure cleansing of these people from my feeds. I wish I didn't have to see them at races.
-They have few (or no) real sponsors, but they like to imply that they do...e.g. they @ reply brands even if they pay retail for the product. #simplyfaster -- except that you're slow, and Cervelo doesn't sponsor you.
-They have impossibly high opinions of themselves, and issue glamorous training selfies with unreal regularity. #timetrialtuesday -- here's a question: how much time did you spend setting up your iPhone for that profile shot?
-They typically don't adult or career in any sense...they are either family-moneyed enough to train all day and jetset around the world, dwelling in temperate climates year round, or they run a "full time coaching business" and act like they are some kind of wildly gifted young entrepreneur. #30under30 -- hey bud, news flash: three or four fat, 14 hour Iron-dentist clients do not make you a professional services company
-They are not fast enough to act this important.
There are at least three species:
- The 'pros' are simply elite card holders who are beaten by at least one amateur per 70.3 race, or average that over the course of the season...and that's only if they have the stones to show at major races. Too often, they just cherry pick victories at regional Oly's, then blow up their Facebooks so their parents and their NARP friends think they a Professional. Athlete.
- The most common profamateur is an amateur who is not fast enough to be a pro, until he or she final finishes third in the least attended $20k purse race on the planet. And then this person takes the elite card and, trust me, you'll know it when he/she does.
- There's another, less common but equally grotesque sub-species, who is very fast, pro like fast -- tops at Hy-Vee/USAT nats fast -- and remains an amateur to smack around other 'elitish' amateurs at...you guessed it, regional Oly's.
- Then there is maybe the worst of the bunch: the slow amateur who acts like and even seems to think he is a pro. He shares all the qualities above except he doesn't even podium at major races. Ever. He not only rides a Dimond (#brilliantunderpressure), but wears the Dimond kit and plasters Team Dimond all over his shit -- and he paid retail!
By way of example, one joke of an elite card holder -- he is slower than me, and I am maybe half an hour (in 70.3) too slow for a discounted Fuji -- just launched his own clothing line. I can't make this up. The clothing is utterly hideous, and the brand has its own social media accounts -- and is has, of course, its own hash tag. #bedisruptive
Wow. Are these the douchiest species' in all of sports? Absolutely intolerable. I have opted for pure cleansing of these people from my feeds. I wish I didn't have to see them at races.