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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [Jigsy] [ In reply to ]
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Jigsy wrote:
ericmulk wrote:
Velocibuddha wrote:
Midtown Miles wrote:
Liaman wrote:
Order of preference:
1) shit outside (aka squat behind a bush etc)
2) play the door knocking game
3) shit pants

I should have known better than to check on this thread during a work meeting.


Well, 3) is gonna happen at some point (because things happen suddenly sometimes).

But, 2)???????

I can’t see how this could ever be better than 1) or 3).

Safety?
Do gun nuts and dogs react positively to a strangers request to shit in their house!!

Legality?
Has no-one ever got arrested or harassed by police for asking to shit in a strangers house?

Politeness?
Is asking to take a shit in a strangers house, more polite than doing a ninja shit (that will get blamed on a neighbors dog)?

Embarrassment?
Is it less embarrassing, to ask a stranger to take a shit in their house, than doing a ninja shit and running off?

Convenience?
Not even worth discussing!

I concede that some urban (and suburban) areas don’t offer good cover.
But these seem to be precisely the places, where people are least likely to be sympathetic to a request to shit in their house.


+1000, it has never even occurred to me to go up to someone's door and ask to use the BR. :)


On top of that, I would be likely bursting by that point and the wait (answer the door, introduction, request, decision) would prove fatal.

Ya, you'd have sh*t running out of your shoes and then you're going to track that sh*t into the person's house??? I don't think so. :)


"Anyone can be who they want to be IF they have the HUNGER and the DRIVE."
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [RandMart] [ In reply to ]
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RandMart wrote:
It occurs to me that I'd be more likely to find myself in an "Emergency Exit" situation in Barnes & Noble than on a run/ride

https://en.wikipedia.org/...riko_Aoki_phenomenon

That is hilarious!
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [afrizzledfry] [ In reply to ]
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afrizzledfry wrote:
RandMart wrote:
It occurs to me that I'd be more likely to find myself in an "Emergency Exit" situation in Barnes & Noble than on a run/ride

https://en.wikipedia.org/...riko_Aoki_phenomenon


That is hilarious!

Sh**t, i've had to take an "emergency crap" (EC) in all kinds of places: bookstores, hardware stores, etc. Every 3 months or so, i have to get out of the pool mid-swim or off the bike mid-ride, and at least 1/month i pull into the bushes on the run. Further, virtually 365 days/yr i have at least one EC where i have to stop what i'm doing and hit the closest BR. Hell, this evening i was just taking my dogs for a brief, 1-mi walk/run at the park, and it was all i could to hang on until we made it back to the BR, and i was simply walking, they were the only runners this evening. :)


"Anyone can be who they want to be IF they have the HUNGER and the DRIVE."
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Post deleted by windschatten [ In reply to ]
Last edited by: windschatten: Feb 20, 18 22:15
Re: I just shit my pants mid run [windschatten] [ In reply to ]
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windschatten wrote:
RandMart wrote:
It occurs to me that I'd be more likely to find myself in an "Emergency Exit" situation in Barnes & Noble than on a run/ride

https://en.wikipedia.org/...riko_Aoki_phenomenon


What was "Barnes & Noble"?

Kinda like a cross between Amazon & Starbucks





"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [RandMart] [ In reply to ]
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The great thing about a real bricks-and-mortar bookstore is that you can just drop by and read a book or two any time from 0900 to 2200. They have some padded comfy chairs and some wooden chairs in the bookstore, plus tables and chairs in the cafe', so i can always get a seat somewhere. I've read numerous books in the store but then did not buy them b/c i didn't care for them that much. OTOH, i did buy 17 books at my local B&N last year so i am helping to keep them in business. i generally stop by my B&N about 3 days/wk for 1-1.5 hr or so.


"Anyone can be who they want to be IF they have the HUNGER and the DRIVE."
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [ericmulk] [ In reply to ]
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ericmulk wrote:
Sh**t, i've had to take an "emergency crap" (EC) in all kinds of places: bookstores, hardware stores, etc. Every 3 months or so, i have to get out of the pool mid-swim or off the bike mid-ride, and at least 1/month i pull into the bushes on the run. Further, virtually 365 days/yr i have at least one EC where i have to stop what i'm doing and hit the closest BR. Hell, this evening i was just taking my dogs for a brief, 1-mi walk/run at the park, and it was all i could to hang on until we made it back to the BR, and i was simply walking, they were the only runners this evening. :)
I was eating some Kashi cereals a few years ago and I couldn't get through a run without stopping in a park bathroom or a Wendy's that just happened to be at the point where something "had to happen"...

I stopped with the Kashi and can get through my runs no problem now.
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [ericmulk] [ In reply to ]
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ericmulk wrote:
I've read numerous books in the store but then did not buy them b/c i didn't care for them that much

Have you considered joining a library? They're free there too [unless you forget to return them, that is]

"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [RandMart] [ In reply to ]
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RandMart wrote:
ericmulk wrote:
I've read numerous books in the store but then did not buy them b/c i didn't care for them that much


Have you considered joining a library? They're free there too [unless you forget to return them, that is]


The bookstore is a more attractive venue for sitting and reading, better selection, better hours, better looking clientèle/staff, plus you can eat and drink while you read. It's just a nice place to go to get out of the house, and it requires no effort unlike the gym. Certainly, i go to the library on occasion but generally only for old books that are out of print. I have donated around 400 or so older books from my parents' library, and/or from my "earlier years", to our central county library.


"Anyone can be who they want to be IF they have the HUNGER and the DRIVE."
Last edited by: ericmulk: Jan 23, 18 9:15
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [ericmulk] [ In reply to ]
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Gotcha

"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [RandMart] [ In reply to ]
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Heard a good euphemism on the Mountain Bike Radio podcast, discussing the 10PM start time of the Vapor Trail 125 MTB race

"Generally, these things start at 6 or 7 in the morning; so you wake up, you have enough coffee that you can do some Stage One Weight Reduction. you might eat a bagel or oatmeal, and then you go race"

"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [RandMart] [ In reply to ]
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This thread makes me feel so much less alone in the universe. Needing to poop and having almost no where to do it is a daily occurrence. I drop 2-4 loafs throughout the morning so sometimes I think i'm totally clear and begin my run into suburbia only to realize I'm one loaf shy of an empty nest. I've had to drop my drawers far more times in places that aren't bathrooms than I care to admit.

I think in the past decade I've probably either pooped or half pooped myself like...2-3x.

Outside of the fact that it makes for a miserable run that day, there's no shame in it happening. Happens to all who run enough.

The Home of Advanced Running
Advanced Running Instagram Page
My narcisstic training log
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [justarunner] [ In reply to ]
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justarunner wrote:
'm one loaf shy of an empty nest.

A more mixed metaphor, I've never read

"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [afrizzledfry] [ In reply to ]
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Has nobody heard of these things? A single is so small I can carry it on any run I do; you can stuff it anywhere.

Step 1: Find a spot to "do your business." Woods, alley, neighbors front lawn.
Step 2a: Do your business.
Step 2b: While completing Step 2a, open packet near one end. Do not rip completely off.
Step 3: Clean self.
Step 4: Stuff used Wet One back into packet.
Step 5: Continue run completely comfortable.
Step 6: Dispose of used packet at next opportunity.
Step 7: Ruminate on why you ever used a shirt/sock/headband/Poison Oak/etc.
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [toughie96] [ In reply to ]
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toughie96 wrote:
Has nobody heard of these things? A single is so small I can carry it on any run I do; you can stuff it anywhere.


Step 1: Find a spot to "do your business." Woods, alley, neighbors front lawn.
Step 2a: Do your business.
Step 2b: While completing Step 2a, open packet near one end. Do not rip completely off.
Step 3: Clean self.
Step 4: Stuff used Wet One back into packet.
Step 5: Continue run completely comfortable.
Step 6: Dispose of used packet at next opportunity.
Step 7: Ruminate on why you ever used a shirt/sock/headband/Poison Oak/etc.



That's a nice list, but the problem for most of us is step one, finding a spot. I've lived in places where finding a place to drop the browns off is never an issue, but where I currently excited it's a surburbia wasteland. No forest, no parks with bathrooms, no where where I can tuck behind without being exposed to another vantage point, etc. It's brutal.

Once I find a place to go, I don't need a damn wet wipe, that's what grass, leaves, or the 50 grit sand paper I run with is for...


The Home of Advanced Running
Advanced Running Instagram Page
My narcisstic training log
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [justarunner] [ In reply to ]
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I thought the "neighbors front lawn" made it evident I know this sometimes happens in a public place...
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [toughie96] [ In reply to ]
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My point is you are discussing wet wipes as if that was the important issue. Wiping is the absolute least of my concern. I could have all the wet wipes in the world but without a place to poop, I could not careless about wet wipes. Even with a place to poop, just use leaves or the legendary Lamb's Ear. Or if it's winter, snow, while cold, makes for a nice clean wipe.

The Home of Advanced Running
Advanced Running Instagram Page
My narcisstic training log
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [justarunner] [ In reply to ]
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justarunner wrote:
[where I currently excited it's a surburbia wasteland. No forest, no parks with bathrooms, no where where I can tuck behind without being exposed to another vantage point, etc. It's brutal.

Once I find a place to go, I don't need a damn wet wipe, that's what grass, leaves, or the 50 grit sand paper I run with is for...

Keep an eye out for ongoing construction projects [roadwork, houses, etc.] and use their porta pottys

"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [RandMart] [ In reply to ]
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I'm waiting for the "Weirdest Thing ..." and "Shit my Pants" thread crossover

"We were on our usual Saturday Morning club ride, when we saw someone taking a shit on someone's lawn"

"One Saturday morning, I had to pull over to take a dump, and all of a sudden, mid-plop, this club ride rolled past me"

"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [afrizzledfry] [ In reply to ]
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I pooped at the 11 mile point of an 18 mile run last Saturday. Went into a woods, leaned my back against a tree and let it happen. I’ve been thinking about it all week, sitting in conference rooms, talking about business stuff. I’ve been daydreaming about that poop. It was the most liberating experience of my life. Hope it happens again tomorrow.
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [RandMart] [ In reply to ]
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I'm waiting for OWS swimmers to add to this by relating their experiences in training or a race. Of course, there's also the possibility of someone relating their experience of swimming through that. "I didn't know there were octopi in freshwater lakes, in Oklahoma..."

I remember that 140triwife told me that she did it once. She's definitely a BOP swimmer, so she took advantage of people in the training group swim knowing that and not being surprised that she dropped of the back. I was way ahead on the out-and-back swim that I didn't know until later, when she told me. I know that it's a big lake, but our course goes close to shore for the entire out-and-back route, so it's possible that someone swam through it at some point.

Pro: you can totally conceal the area below your waist underwater. You're also lots cleaner than doing it on land.

Con: without a current, there's little, uh, water movement.
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [140triguy] [ In reply to ]
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I just spent a couple of weeks working at a large Resort hotel - frequented by Europeans, so lots of morning runners.

There is a shower block at one stage - showers are closest to the path, toilets are somewhat hidden away from the path.

Couple of times in the week, there was talk of freshly laid turds in the showers, early in the morning.

Being a known morning runner, I was on the suspect list, but definitely not me as my poop-cycle/timing was good that week. You generally know when you've done enough pre-run and you know when things didn't quite happen and you're likely to hit trouble.

My race site: https://racesandplaces.wixsite.com/racesandplaces
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [140triguy] [ In reply to ]
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140triguy wrote:
I'm waiting for OWS swimmers to add to this by relating their experiences in training or a race. Of course, there's also the possibility of someone relating their experience of swimming through that. "I didn't know there were octopi in freshwater lakes, in Oklahoma..."

Pro: you can totally conceal the area below your waist underwater. You're also lots cleaner than doing it on land.

Con: without a current, there's little, uh, water movement.

https://www.theinertia.com/...rt-of-the-aqua-dump/

"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [RandMart] [ In reply to ]
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OMG, I nearly got a new hernia from laughing!
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Re: I just shit my pants mid run [afrizzledfry] [ In reply to ]
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Could be worse ... you could be at 14,000 feet [or more], and have to find yourself a baggie and a popper-scooper

https://www.theguardian.com/...s-denali-poop-alaska

https://parkplanning.nps.gov/...Epdf&sfid=310666

"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin
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