I know this is kind of Budda, but just live and train one day at a time, stay in the moment. Get up in the morning and make your plan for the day, and thats it. Its fine to enter races out in the future, or even plan some workouts with friends, but really, just take each day on how you feel that day. If you feel shitty and miss a workout, there is tomorrow.

I had to come to this conclusion in my youth, and it served me well through over a dozen years as a pro, and now as a typical age grouper. I find this way I actually get more done, no expirations for tomorrow, and on good days you stay out there and keep going. Do that well for a month or so, then look for a race to keep the motivation up...

The only way I can get back into it is to remove all the expectations, such as, pacing, distance, HR ,etc.. Just breath out and go run easy even if it's 2 minutes slower per mile or bike easy with no stress on the body, swim workout a workout plan and just do what you want with as much rest as you want. In other words go enjoy it and stop putting so much pressure on yourself.

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http://www.sfuelsgolonger.com

Why do you train?

For a long time I thought it was to hit a specific goal / pace / power

Now I do it because i enjoy it. I love the feeling before, during and after exercising

Sure I want to be stronger and faster... but I’d sure as heck rather be riding slow than not riding

Other one is realizing what my “potential” is. When I was starting I thought I could win something ... realizing that’s never going to happen means i enjoy the journey a bit more instead of undue / unrealistic pressure

Said another way , i try to just go out and have fun, so my best and try again tomorrow

For missed workout specifically, I try to not think about it and instead get busy setting myself up for success on the next one, which is often as simple as getting my clothes out, tires pumped, etc. I find the smallest amount of prep gets me mentally back on track and focused on the next thing.

Randomly, this is sort of akin to getting the beans soaking in the morning or the vegetables chopped and into a container. I haven’t really made dinner yet, but I have removed the thinking about when I get home so I can just go on autopilot and get it done rather than dig through the cupboards trying to figure out what to make when I’m already hungry.

Thanks guys. I have been working on my mindful training lately. Or at the very least keeping in the moment.
Mark

process

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Eric Reid AeroFit | Instagram Portfolio
Aerodynamic Retul Bike Fitting

“You are experiencing the criminal coverup of a foreign backed fascist hostile takeover of a mafia shakedown of an authoritarian religious slow motion coup. Persuade people to vote for Democracy.”

Being a type A personality isn't all it is cracked up to be. So there is that.

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They constantly try to escape from the darkness outside and within
Dreaming of systems so perfect that no one will need to be good T.S. Eliot

Been there, done that.

One of the things that helped me deal with the "pressure" of completing the work was to understand that one workout or one day didn't really mean anything in the long run. It's the body of work over a period of time that counts.

It's the same with eating. I used to screw up a day and then just say "$uck it" and go totally off the deep end. Now I understand that the extra 1K of calories I binged on isn't all that big a deal. I just put it behind me and start over the next day.

Good luck

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"Good genes are not a requirement, just the obsession to beat ones brains out daily"...the Griz

Sometimes I need perspective and to remember how lucky we are to wake myself up and get out of any bad feelings

This is sports. We are not supposed to keep exceeding - this is all part of the game we’re in.

“I was blue because I had no shoes, until on the street I met a man who had no feet...”

Mark,

Read over what Monty said. Quite honestly, that was my approach when I was training and racing a lot and at my best - worked well for me. The workout plan for the week was always reasonably loose. If something came up to mean missing a session . . no big deal. Move on to the next day. What I've found is more important is hitting key sessions during a month!

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Steve Fleck @stevefleck | Blog

Damn! 9 responses and not single HTFU. What site is this and where is slowtwitch.com?

Seriously though, I too have been struggling for a couple of years. Time for me to HTFU!

Mark,

One thing I've always done with athletes is create an goal. Create 3 sub goals that showcase your on the right steps to making that goal. Want to run 18 min 5k- 1) you need the endurance to run fast 3 miles (so that means longer runs) . 2) need to be able to hold ~5:45 mile pace, so if you cant run 1 mile at that pace, then you cant run 3.... 3) need to recover quick on mile repeats....so run 5:30 mile pace w/ 90s rest seeing if you can do 4 of them, etc. (break it down to 800's if you need too)...just one example of good goal sessions.

I tell my athletes, "90% rule"....if you do 90% of the work over a training block (let's say that's a month time frame), your going to be on your way to making your goal. Now the more specific and "reaching" your goal is, your going to obviously be held to a stricter standard, but dont brow beat yourself over a missed workout. Shit happens, life happens. It's when you let that 1 workout affect you that it becomes an issue.


To me it sounds like you need realistic reaching goals. If you know you'll only give X, then make sure you work towards a goal that allows X to be achievable. Don't shot for FOP if your going to give MOP effort, you'll only see yourself failing. So make it goals that are achievable and are fun to go after.

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Brooks Doughtie, M.S.
Exercise Physiology
-USAT Level II

So it sounds as if when things go to pot, they can easily spin out of control further. I haven't seen a response that addresses this yet & most are about process and just keep going and get it done. Look at the center of the discouragement, and why it weighs so heavily on you. What is your history with depression/family history (look into that). There is nothing to be ashamed of, it happens more than you think. This may not at all be a "bummed and don't have the motivation to put it together--setbacks thing" it may be you get depressed. Could be chemical, mental/emotional...while I'm not a psychologist I've dealt with a lot of people who have had those feelings. Some were manic depressive and needed lithium to pull out of it. So what I'm saying is, your disappointments may be something else you haven't thought of. Take it seriously.

Like other have said, Enjoy the process.

Also:
1.) Take stock of your limiters. Can you eliminate or change any of these to aid in success?
Can you live with the limiters that you cannot change?
2.) Is your training realistic? Realistic with your ability, goals, time available to train, time available to recover, family time, etc.?
When you try to train in a manner that is not realistic- It is easy to crack when things go wrong.
3.) Are your goals realistic? Is having fun one of them?
4.) Do you have a coach? Or coach yourself in a manner where you can make changes on the fly to suit fitness, schedule, time, etc.?
5.) Can you schedule your training so that you get up in the morning and get something on the board 1st thing?
Having a daunting training session after a long day at work can be a recipe for disaster for some-

I’ve been dealing with this in my professional life. It presents different for me. I’m afraid of failing on projects and it creates anxiety. When I have anxiety and stress nothing good happens. I can’t work and i’m a crappy husband. This sounds corny but i’ve been watching every tony Robbins video I can find. This led me to two actions. I’m reprogramming my mind’s response to failure as a learning experience and not anxiety. This helped me. The second one is about channeling good energy. I try to think of 3 instances where I felt really good. Like live in that moment. Spend a minute on each. Then spend 3 minutes thinking about your 6-9 month goals and imagine how it will feel achieving them. I did it today for the first time and felt great!

Unless you are a pro and relying on this sport for your livelihood, always remember that this sport is NOT that important! It should be something we like doing, an enjoyable way to stay healthy and in some case sane in a crazy world.

Always remember that someone else has it worse. The people not able to get up and run, bike, swim at all despite a strong desire to do so. Others who can but at a much lower intensity than most, the ones you pass on the trail, road or swim lane. Some who were at a high level and through injury or accident, are now unable to compete. Some, like in my case, who were in the midst of training up for another IM event when they were diagnosed with cancer.

Take a step back and think about something before your personality and emotions take you to a bad place. Think: why am I doing this? What does success look like to me and what does it mean to me in the long term? Will my lack of a perfect day have any impact on me as a person or the success of my life in 1,5, 10 or 20 years?

When you have a bad day, shake it off and pick it up at the next opportunity. Adapt to the change with a good attitude. Races are ALWAYS like that! Think of adversity in your training like a race; it will always be a challenge to overcome, not a reason to stop or get a bad attitude. Factor bad days into your schedule because you and everyone else will have those days, just like on race day when it decides to rain, get much colder or hotter than expected and you have to adapt.

I've had races where it was too cold (75F the day before the race, 29F in transition the next morning), too hot and races where I had more flats than I had tubes and CO2 bottles. Because I train for bad days and expect my plans to go off the tracks, those days just make me smile because in those cases my plan for worked perfectly!

Funny that you picked up on that. I have been getting treated for depression for the past 8 months now which has helped the depression but it has REALLY exasperated the apathy I am feeling towards even working out and getting back into the training.

In terms of A most people feel this way and its completely normal.
In terms of B this is where you need to do some work on adaptability. Realize that almost nothing goes to plan, but you can still achieve your goal when it doesnt. In fact, you usually learn that your plan was wrong all along and there are more ways than 1 to achieve a goal. As others have mentioned have intermediary goals along the way to help you stay on track for something that seems far off or long reaching.

This is an interesting topic! I feel for you, OP, it's a tough thing to overcome and then keep at bay. My first though is this:
Comparison is the thief of joy. I don't think we're supposed to grind day in day out, pounding our bodies and minds into submission. There has to be a "why" behind it. Hopefully the reason you started this sport is because it gave you joy. If you go bonkers comparing your workouts on strava, to last year, to someone else, or even yesterdays workout, it's easy to feel like a failure. Don't lose your joy.

I've had some wonderful races and great results. But I've had some epic fails. Everyone does, regardless of what they think lol!

And there's no shame in seeking professional help too.

Josh

Saw this the other day and it struck a cord with me. The guy is a former Navy Seal, now a business coach, so it is not directly aimed at athletes but it does sum up very well a big part of the attitude you need as an athlete.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IdTMDpizis8




Oh, the mission got canceled? Good… We can focus on another one.
Didn’t get the new high-speed gear we wanted? Good… We can keep it simple.
Didn’t get promoted? Good… More time to get better.
Didn’t get funded? Good… We own more of the company.
Didn’t get the job you wanted? Good… Go out, gain more experience, and build a better resume.
Got injured? Good… Needed a break from training.
Got tapped out? Good… It’s better to tap out in training than tap out on the street.
Got beat? Good… We learned.
Unexpected problems? Good… We have to figure out a solutions
"That’s it. When things are going bad: Don’t get all bummed out, don’t get started, don’t get frustrated. No. Just look at the issue and say: “Good.”
Now, I don’t mean to say something trite; I’m not trying to sound like Mr. Smiley Positive Guy.
That guy ignores the hard truth.
That guy thinks a positive attitude will solve problems.
It won’t. But neither will dwelling on the problem. No. Accept reality, but focus on the solution. Take that issue, take that setback, take that problem, and turn it into something good. Go forward. And, if you are part of a team, that attitude will spread throughout.
Finally: if you can say the word “good,” then guess what?
It means you’re still alive.
It means you’re still breathing.
And if you’re still breathing, that means you’ve still got some fight left in you.
So get up, dust off, reload, recalibrate, re-engage – and go out on the attack.”

Are you taking an antidepressant? It could be affecting your desire to exercise. I feel for you. Exercise has always been an effective therapy for me, even when I've been depressed. I'm very thankful for that. Maybe start with your only goal being to take a walk in the morning and evening?

None of that strikes me as the least bit unusual.

A/ is the trickier one IMO. I have a bit of the same. It's not fear of failure, so much as lack of motivation if objectively the chances of failure are extremely high..... I should point out that I don't subscribe to belief or willpower being physical properties! ;)
Are you setting the target too high or just too anxious of failing? Maybe consider that not trying is the real failure. Every day that you keep trying is a success in itself, the final goal is just an output of that process. i.e. It's not all or nothing. The training is more important than the event, unless you're a pro, or really, really insecure.

B/ used to cause me problems when I started training. I was a big perfectionist right into my early 30s which typically meant I'd either get very annoyed by or lose enthusiasm for anything once it went became irrecoverably flawed. If my adherence to my training plan was imperfect, that took half the good out of it, and there's always some hiccups, so there was always frustration. I have largely gotten over that, both in training and other parts of life. Using the training example, I think the secret is to decide, when you are assembling the plan in the first place, that it's not a prescription. Instead, it's a list of the activities you would undertake IF you were to train on all of those days. But you are not committing to doing all of that training. You are committing to following it's intent as far as possible. Since beating yourself up about missing one or more sessions is counterproductive to it's continuation, success is defined as getting back on track. The plan is not your boss, it's just something to help you decide what to do today. Missing a session is not a failure, since the plan is dynamic. Every so often you check how the plan corresponds with reality. If it's still somewhat realistic, leave it alone. If not, tweak it to suit. It should remain optimistic so you're not under the illusion it has now become a prescription again.....

I should mention I don't subscribe to the personality type stuff. Nothing's that neat and tidy, I consider it more misleading than useful. Nevertheless, bear in mind that you, with a different set of drives, wouldn't be you. It'd be some other guy. Not much point wishing you had a different mind, it's meaningless!

Jocko is pretty legit when it comes to a lot of things.

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Washed up footy player turned Triathlete.

Most triathletes over estimate their abilities. This leads to setting unrealistic goals, and thus increases the likelihood of "failure". The sad part is, in many instances, they didn't fail at all, they just set a poor goal. This is especially true of the wannabe Kona crowd: seems like it is usually under 40yo men, that finish 15th-25th AG in WTC events who believe they are Kona contenders, but this just isn't the case, so they think 9:30 is their A+ race, but then are down in the dumps when they hit 10:15, when in reality that was a damn good race based on history, fitness, etc.

Improve your goal setting, and you will limit your setbacks and disappointments, and be a happier athlete.