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American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread
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Course record is going down in the short course race......

*********************
"When I first had the opportunity to compete in triathlon, it was the chicks and their skimpy race clothing that drew me in. Everyone was so welcoming and the lifestyle so obviously narcissistic. I fed off of that vain energy. To me it is what the sport is all about."
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Tri_yoda] [ In reply to ]
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Since this is a more appropos home for this commentary from the other A-Z thread:


Speaking of which, since I was unable to deliver my keg of whoop-ass to Desert Dude up in MTL, I managed to sneak it back across the border.
(that's what I get for spotting that fishie bastid 10 mins outta the water... only made back 9 of 'em after that. Note - there is no swim at A-Z.)

It's been on ice ever since, and is just waiting to be served up frosty cold and fresh to you, Chad, tetsuoni, Tyler_Durden, and the rest of the ST crew on 10/12.
mmmmMMMMMMmmmmm whoop-ass. Mohonk Mountain Refreshment! : )


Oh, and I haven't forgotten about you, Yoda.....
(SC p*ssy ;-)

Here's how I'm going to smack you down, virtually:

Add up my 1st run split, first loop of the bike, and first loop of the 2nd run, plus transitions.
They will be faster in total than your SC race time.

Meaning - I will virtually smack you down in the SC, all while racing LC.

Now THAT is going to leave a mark.... ;-)



float , hammer , and jog

Last edited by: Murphy'sLaw: Sep 24, 08 17:59
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Murphy'sLaw] [ In reply to ]
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I said daaaayam! Here we go!
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Murphy'sLaw] [ In reply to ]
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I will chug an Irish car bomb in T2 and still beat your time by 5 minutes.
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Tri_yoda] [ In reply to ]
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Sorry I am doing the Long Course, so I cannot participate in that Smack Talk Thread, I do not have time for that!
I need to find the American Zofingen Long Talk Thread.....

Fred.
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Tri_yoda] [ In reply to ]
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Now THAT I've gotta see!


float , hammer , and jog

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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Murphy'sLaw] [ In reply to ]
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That's some big talk, bro. Sounds like someone got a little action this weekend. I'll gladly accept my <insert quantity here> of whoop ass. I've been tapering for this race since June...
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [tyler_durden] [ In reply to ]
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I've been tapering for this race since June...

Ha! Ha! Ha!!
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Tri_yoda] [ In reply to ]
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Yoda, you put it in writing, and can't take it back.

Course marshals will be enforcing your boast.

Irish car bomb to be chugged in T2. No puking on the trail. Real athletes need to run on it for the LC.

2015 American Zofingen Du is May 17.
R.I.P. Chris Gleason
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [tyler_durden] [ In reply to ]
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It wouldn't be much of a smack talk thread if I said stuff like "well, I hope to have a good day, and God willing, I'll have a good result.", or, "it's a really competitive field, and I only hope I can give those guys a good run for their money."

Bor-ing!!!

Besides, A-Z is like the only LC race I ever do where I'm not spotting the field oodles of time before hitting the bike.
I like my chances (at least in terms of being in the mix w/ the ST Smackdown action).


Man oh man was it nipply riding out this am. 44 and damp. Coulda used the toe covers for sure, and warmer gloves too.
First official "lights and tights" ride of the Fall season.
Game on!


float , hammer , and jog

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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Murphy'sLaw] [ In reply to ]
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Ha. If you're coming in as a "self proclaimed" favorite, then I'm coming in as the spoiler...ML spoiler to be more precise. I'll hand ya an extra gel when I pass ya on the 3rd loop of the run...
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [tyler_durden] [ In reply to ]
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Only the "favorite" amongst the ST Smackdown crew (PS - anybody who happens to be a Pro duathlete with the initials JB does not apply!!!!)

And only cuz I've got 2 decent finishes on the course, so unlike many of the other folks, I know what I've gotten myself into.
For better or worse.

The only way you are gonna pass me on the run course, is if I've been mauled by a bear. And even then, I doubt it. ;-)


float , hammer , and jog

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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [tyler_durden] [ In reply to ]
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I'll snap beer caps at the two of you as you start your third lap of the run and I'm already counting my prize money.

2015 American Zofingen Du is May 17.
R.I.P. Chris Gleason
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [tetsuoni] [ In reply to ]
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I'll snap beer caps at the two of you as you start your third lap of the run and I'm already counting ML's prize money.

** corrected that for ya! ** : )


Gravity is not your friend, Cartman. This course was made for a skinny f'er like me.
You? Uh, not so much..... ;-)

PS - I'm currently 3lbs UNDER my normal race weight.
I'm going all Yoda on everybody's ass - I'll turn sideways and have negative drag. ;-)


float , hammer , and jog

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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Murphy'sLaw] [ In reply to ]
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True, weight counts for a lot on the AmZof course.

I'm pulling a Jan Ullrich this year. I was up to 181 yesterday morning. No more beer until after the race.

As my best race weight was 163 back in 2004-2005, I've got my work cut out for me.

2015 American Zofingen Du is May 17.
R.I.P. Chris Gleason
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [tetsuoni] [ In reply to ]
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Sounds more like yer pulling a Greg Lemond to me, only without the retirement part. ;-)

What's sick is - you'll be right there with all the fast doodes, in spite of the 15-20 lbs beer storage unit.
You are a mutant. Never cease to amaze me.


float , hammer , and jog

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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Tri_yoda] [ In reply to ]
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Ok, so I wanna join this smack talk thread. Who's vying for the lanterne rouge? Don't even think about it. That baby's all mine and no one's going to take it from me without some serious competition. Tongue
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [tetsuoni] [ In reply to ]
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Bribes, I mean donations, will be accepted at the timing trailer if anyones needs some time added to their rivals finishing time.

$10 gets your enemy a 2 minute penalty
$50 gets them 5 (or give two rivals 2.5 minutes each)
Want to cut a full lap off that last run for yourself, deliver a P4 to YellowJacket Racing Inter Galactic Head Quarters no later then 12/25/08.

Save 50% when purchasing multiple penalties. 25% discount for penalities dished out to JM.

Now isn't this easier then training and racing hard. We are just here to help.

Boots
Fleet Feet Rochester, NY
Fleet Feet Buffalo, NY
YellowJacket Racing, Rochester, NY
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Tri_yoda] [ In reply to ]
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I met him in a swamp down in Dagoba
Where it bubbles all the time like a giant carbonated soda
S O D A, soda

I saw the little runt sitting there on a log
I asked him his name and in a raspy voice he said "Yoda"
Y O D A, Yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda

Well, I've been around, but I ain't never seen
A guy who looks like a muppet, but he's wrinkled and green
Oh, my Yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda

Well, I'm not dumb, but I can't understand
How he can lift me in the air just by raising his hand
Oh, my Yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda

Well, I left home just a week before
And I've never ever been a Jedi before
But Obi Wan, he set me straight, of course
He said, "Go to Yoda and he'll show you the Force"

Well I'm not the kind that would argue with Ben
So it looks like I'm gonna start all over again
With my Yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda

Yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda

So I used the Force
I picked up a box
I lifted some rocks
While I stood on my head
Well, I won't forget what Yoda said

He said, "Luke, stay away from the darker side
And if you start to go astray, let the Force be your guide"
Oh, my Yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda

"I know Darth Vader's really got you annoyed
But remember, if you kill him, then you'll be unemployed"
Oh, my Yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda

Well, I heard my friends really got in a mess
So I'm gonna have to leave Yoda, I guess
But I know that I'll be coming back some day
I'll be playing this part 'till I'm old and gray

The long-term contract that I had to sign
Says I'll be making these movies till the end of time
With my Yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda

Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda
Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda

Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda
Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda

Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda
Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda

http://www.mountainmettle.com
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [Tri_yoda] [ In reply to ]
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All I can say is that the personalities involved, this thread might have the highest entertainment value from a smacktalk perspective on ST this year. The Esprit smack thread set the gold standard....the Savageman thread while featuring a bunch of studly dudes from an athletic perspective, did not match the athletic studliness with respect to smacktalk coefficient.

I strongly believe that this thread has the potential to take things over the top and take the ST award, for the year.

I will tune in frequently to ensure that you boyz are making the Joe Frazier vs Mohammed Ali "Thrilla in Manila" complete with Howard Cosell intervention, look amateur with respect to smacktalk. Is Tetsoni the "Don King" of this event, on account of being the event promoter?

In a brief post-fight interview with one of the commentators, Ali announced, "Joe Frazier is the greatest fighter in the world, next to me."

Who will be Ali and who will be Frazier at AZ?

Dev
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [ In reply to ]
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A poem (lesson for those that did not get schooled already) for your enjoyment by Desert Dude aka the Smackdown King


Smack talkin' done Right


I had a can of whoop ass that i've already given to my friends
I still have a can of whoop ass that I'd give to them again
it's great to talk a good game
but it's much, much better to put them all to shame
swim bike and run, it's all really just fun
what I ask was the score after the final run?
talk smack only when you've got the goods my friends
to back it, dish it out and not have to eat it again.

Brian Stover USAT LII
Accelerate3 Coaching
Insta

Last edited by: desert dude: Sep 25, 08 9:24
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [tetsuoni] [ In reply to ]
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Is Josh planning on racing the LC? There maybe someone who could give challange him. I am still trying to convince him to race.

Mike

http://www.MikeCaiazzo.com
http://www.USProTri.com
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [FF Boots] [ In reply to ]
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Tough choice - give my P4 to Boots, and get to drink beer between now and October 12. Or, keep my P4, and exercise some discipline for a change. I'm so confused.

2015 American Zofingen Du is May 17.
R.I.P. Chris Gleason
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [tetsuoni] [ In reply to ]
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Now hold on a darn moment! How come for Yoda it's some kind of smack talking one upmanship to have to do a single car bomb when last year you forced me to finish one after every lap? Well at least that's what I have to assume happened. It was the only explanation I could come up with for the constant state of feeling like I was going to hurl or pass out, or pass out from hurling.


-Andrew Saar
It is better to do the right thing and be paid poorly,
than to do the wrong thing and be rewarded richly.
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Re: American Zofingen Smack Talk Thread [mcaiazzo] [ In reply to ]
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Mike, Josh is planning on racing. Who might challenge him, besides me of course?

2015 American Zofingen Du is May 17.
R.I.P. Chris Gleason
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