It's a VERY tender subject.

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Dick

Take everything I say with a grain of salt. I know nothing.

Non-cyclists and triathletes call them 'private parts' or other less savory euphemisms. They don't have the same issues, since their 'saddles' are different.

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Dick

Take everything I say with a grain of salt. I know nothing.

If you watched Saturday Night Live the other week I heard an excellent one during a skit - "ABC" or ass-ball-connection. :)

It's mainly cuz we take tremendous delight in explaining to those in the dark exactly what the 'taint', the 'kaziff' and the 'ABC' is.

I'm sitting here waiting, silently pleading, for you to ask what the latter two stand for...

I don't mind talking taint. No different than talking about your knees or shoulders or other anatomy.

1. kaziff
The hairy area on a woman between her legs that leads from her vag to her butthole. Origin: Kaziff it weren't there you'd be eatin' that asshole, not that pussy!

"taint" that just wonderful!

Hey, that's a new (rather profane) definition! we always knew it as 'kaziff it wasn't there, your guts would fall out'. As a surgeon friend of mine once said: "anatomically speaking, i'm not sure that's correct..."

[reply]1. kaziff
The hairy area on a woman between her legs that leads from her vag to her butthole. Origin: Kaziff it weren't there you'd be eatin' that asshole, not that pussy![/reply]

OMG...i'm CRYING. never heard that one. you learn that in the mommy and me playgroups? ;)

I always thought Kaziff it wasn't there, there would be S%^T everywhere;)

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Scott McNamee
Cranks Bicycle Shoppe

I'm not sure I "enjoy" talking about it, but it's something that needs to be dealt with. The perineum (or "taint") takes a beating on those narrow saddles!

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My business-eBodyboarding.com

I never cared or paid attention to my Taint until I had some major problems caused by saddle sores. Now I pay it a lot of attention and take good care of my taint. If I don’t I can’t ride my bike, race or teach cycling classes. If you don’t ride a bike you wouldn’t even know it’s there.



Dave

this is from Dave Zabriskie web site, pretty funny.



MAIN-TAINT-ANCE

An often overlooked part of being a healthy and fast cyclist is the taint. The taint is the part of your body that contacts your saddle. I believe the name was derived from the taint not being the parts that are well know by name: as in it taint that and it sure taint those! If you can’t comfortably sit on the saddle you taint gonna be able to ride your bike very far. This can negativly effect training and racing, so one must keep this area well main-taint-ed. There are three simple concepts to accept and follow: Cleanliness, Lubrication and Dryness. Trust me all of this was learned by experience! Here are the steps to follow:

Begin with a clean taint and chamois (if you are a hairy beast like me you may want to shave the area—USE CAUTION!)
Generously apply chamois cream
Ride, Train, Do what you do
Dismount bike (Follow the next steps immediately and without fail)
i. Remove chamois
ii. Shower
iii. Use a truly antibacterial soap like Hibiclens
Exit Shower
i. Dry taint with towel
ii. Dry taint with air
1. Either remain naked while making your after ride meal or use hair dryer
2. Antique yourself ala Jackass with a handful of Baby Powder

Why do we do this?

The chamois cream, helps reduce chafing that occurs while riding. There are a number of products out there and here are a few that I know work well:
Noxema
Butt Butter
Bag Balm
Assos Chamois cream
Sixtufit

Try them to determine what works best for you. Often when things are getting a bit raw I mix a few to exploit the full potential of each. Do yourself and your training partners a favor by not using too much. I have been known to have a little seep out of my shorts and it never fails to gain the attention of those behind me. Make sure your chamois is in good shape. Don’t use one that is old and worn out. After the ride get out of your shorts ASAP, you don’t wanna start growing mushrooms down there. Get into the shower and wash up, if you are having “problems” use Hibiclens, it is a surgical scrub and very powerful. I take it to races because each hotel has different soaps and who knows which could cause an irritation. After the shower make sure the area is dry either walk around naked for a while and let it air out or use a hairdryer. The final dose of goodness comes from a little shot of baby powder to the taint. By following these steps you should be main-taint-ing fairly well. If you are experiencing some saddle sores sometimes the only way to get rid of them is to stop riding for a couple of days. If it’s really bad you might have to see a doctor. I am sort of an expert so if you want you can send pictures and I’ll give you my opinion on the best way to proceed. PLEASE DON'T!

Oh yeah one more thing I think that can help is to shave all of that “bum fluff” down. It can be tricky, use electric clippers and be careful, I recommend a mirror.

kittycat,

I have no idea. I can only speak for myself. Never have I mentioned my taint in any conversation. Ever.

You really are asking a diverse sort of questions today.

Bernie

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"Slowbern has always made astute observations."-Casey 03/10/2009
2013-2014 Detroit Lions---13-3 until proved otherwise.

Miss Kitty...in response to your question, yes, men not in sports do talk about "taint". I'm in the building industry, and was recently having diner with a mixed group of young architects. After too many cocktails, the subject of taint came up, and everyone, including the females, had jokes, stories, etc. on the subject of taint. The verse I've grown up with, "it 'taint ass, and it 'taint pussy", seems to sum it up the best.

I am with Zabriskie, you gotta shave it. But do it regulary, stubble down there...well let's just say it's not pleasant.

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Portside Athletics Blog

this is going down as one of the worst threads ever. yuck.

see, no good comes from goofing off at work.

HAHA, you started it, I just added some insightful commentary.

This about sums up my Friday at 4pm....

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Portside Athletics Blog

Oops! I was at a family New Yr party.

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_________________
Dick

Take everything I say with a grain of salt. I know nothing.

question: what is a taint?

Answer: I cant tell you what it is, but it taint your ass and it taint your balls.

[reply]this is going down as one of the worst threads ever. yuck. see, no good comes from goofing off at work.[/reply]

Ah, yeah, I'll agree with that.

But I also agree with Zabriskie and the other poster - I also shave down there ala porn star, chamois butter, dry carefully, powder, etc. Hell, I probably take better care of that body part(s) than anyplace else!

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Fatigue is biochemical, not biomechanical.
- Andrew Coggan, PhD

It's all about the taint-to-weight ratio.

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Don't hold back

roof--you've left me shocked.

lol...

Too Much Information!

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Have you hugged Your Mom today?