Nope, you're weird.

Seriously, fake it until you're okay with it. She doesn't want to hear that are freaked out by her body. She's going through enough.

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hahaha....I should maybe put on a caveat that I am not stupid enough to say/make her think something like that. I just don't seem to be getting the same type of joy that she gets when she sees it move around and what not.

Can you just focus on how happy you are about her pregnancy instead at those moments when she's asking you to looking at kicking feet or creepy subdermal movement? That way you're all about the positive and the joy that you feel about being a father is what comes through to her.

Never been pregnant myself, but I think that's what I'd want. I used a similar method when my bf decided to get a tri-related tattoo that I had trouble getting behind. I focused on how proud I was and he was of himself for completing a really tough event and what an amazing moment that was for him, and how nice it would be that he had something to mark that.

And if it helps you feel better....when one of my best friends was pregnant she'd always been sending me updates telling me what vegetable the fetus size roughly corresponded to - she'd be all 'It's the size of a ZUCCHINI!' and I'd be like 'AUGH THANKS FOR RUINING DINNER. GROSS.'

Not sure if having a baby will be in the cards for me but if it is I fully expect to be disgusted by having a fetus living inside me.

HAHA, agreed. My husband is super excited, which puts me at ease. Def fake it!

Yeah, I agree, just fake it. As a pregnant woman it's amazing to feel something kicking and moving inside of you. It still would really weird me out, especially with the big sweeping movements towards the end (as in...wow that was an elbow I just saw moving across my stomach) and I know it was weird for my husband, but he played along.

I've heard it's common for dads to not really feel a connection to the baby until after the birth, when they can hold and feel something real.

If you are weirded out now, wait until you see a little head coming out of your wife. That's crazy stuff.

P.S. One thing that really made me happy was when my husband would put his hand on my belly and feel the baby move. Again, I think it was weird for him, but he knew how it made me happy that he was feeling her move. Maybe that's something your wife would like :-)

agreed...we are within 1 week of my wife's due date with our first, and she loves it when I touch her belly and show as much interest as possible. I know my connection is nowhere near her's for now, so I just try to hone in on what seems to make her happy. Come next week, the little guy will be the center of the universe for both of us.

would you like to help her push and watch the baby come out of the vagina like an alien and then cut the cord...yummmy

I've have 2 young kids and the pregnancy thing was kinda weird to me - having another person inside you can seem a bit, um...strange. I can't even imagine what it's like from a guy's perspective where you are observing the whole thing. I'm sure it's pretty normal and I wouldn't worry at all about it.

But I do agree with the response about faking it. Seriously, your wife is dealing with a lot emotionally and may be a bit out of sorts - definitely don't bring it up. Just smile & act excited.

That said, just a head's up - it might take a little while to warm up to the baby after it's born even. I know a lot of people say it's love at first sight, and many people feel this way. However, it's also perfectly normal to feel like you don't 'know' them. I definitely felt a bit of that. Like our first was a bit of a stranger. When she was first born, we didn't know anything about her - what color would her hair be, her eyes be, what would she like or dislike, her personality...all of that. But babies grow on you very, very fast & before you realize it, you'll have no problem bonding with the little 'alien' :)

Congrats!

FWIW I could never get into touching the moving baby. It also took me about six months to really bond with the kid, as mentioned above. And I stay at home full time! Be supportive in authentic ways. It's a small step in a big process.

NO!! Not weird!!!

I am pregnant myself (v early, about 6 weeks) and it freaks me out!!!! It is very alien and I am dreading the next 8 months!!

I agree with the above posters- just fake it :)

CONGRATULATIONS! What are you doing on ST? you should either be asleep, at the movies, or having some fun that you can't have once the baby comes along. All kidding aside, the woman gets to ride the crest of hormones. NEVER underestimate the hormones. Just because you can't see them doesn't mean they aren't REAL and that they won't come along and WHACK YOU UPSIDE YOUR HEAD when you least expect it. What I'm trying to say is what she is experiencing is enhanced by hormones. You will never get to the where she is, it isn't possible. It's like dealing with a stoned person. Just guide them along their awesome high even though you are sober and think they are beyond ridiculous.

And you can not tell her enough times that she is beautiful, that you love her pregnant body, and that you will never be able to repay her for the gift she is giving you right now. Seriously, if you like having sex, go there.

Good luck! BTW, post baby, she will likely cry everyday for at least 2 weeks. Just because!

Cheers! Life is wonderful! So excited for you.

That's troublesome. Zucchini come in all different sizes!

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x10. Actually every female friend I have that is pregnant, I tell them they are beautiful. They go through a lot and see their body changing in troublesome ways. It's good to get reassurance that things are still "ok". This goes right along with you supporting her interests and NOT being freaked out by the little things. Trust me, things get weirder and the whole "giving birth" thing is something you may want selectively forget. The videos they show in the "classes" are right up there with the driver's ed videos sometimes..

Congrats though. You and her are embarking on an incredible adventure. Look at it that way, enjoy it at every step, and be apart of it with her.

When she was first born, we didn't know anything about her

lol I like how you said that, made me chuckle. I know what you meant but it just struck me as humorous. Like she was a stranger that just showed up...which she was, when you think about it.

I'm pretty sure my husband could have written your post. Very rarely could I get him to touch the buddha belly - especially when it was wriggling and kicking, but thtat didn't stop me from trying to show him the movements or gettting him to feel them. On occasion he would, and it was just weird for him - and told me so, and I was ok with that (maybe I should also say I had no mood swings, no freak out moments, no bitchery, so maybe I was a weird preggo lady in that regard, at least compared to my when preggo psycho-bitch sister in law - someone should have written a pregnant psychology book about her, but that's a different topic, sorry to stray). What he did for me though - telling my how beautiful I was, cooking tons of meals so I could rest on the couch, getting me ice cream, making my lunch for work, rubbing my feet and back, being the sweetest, kindest man alive - that always brought a smile to my face and I knew he was into the pregnancy in other ways. Congrats on the little one coming. The are amazing creatures and it is so fun to have a little human running amok in the house!!

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Thanks a lot ladies. It's good to know I am not THAT odd. :) Needless to say, lots of praise will be coming my wifes way in the next 4 months (and thereafter of course:) ). I really appreciate all the feedback. :)
Mark

:) :)

We have two little ones. My wife often uses her trump card of "I gave birth!" on me. My response is always, "I witnessed it!" I'm not sure who wins that one. That is some crazy, crazy stuff.

LOL. That conversation has already been had and the agreement is that I stay north of the waist. I am not sure I could come back from that vision. :) I don't know how you women do that! Especially naturally.
M~

If you go south, you will never be able to give her a head out that way later again

I just want to say be responsible for your children and wife .

Shani.

Went thru the same sort of thing especially with the first pregnancy. Its not uncommon for guys to be somewhat bewildered by the whole experience. As others have said just fake it and soon it will seem normal.

It's really bad from your side. I think you should love your upcoming baby. Why are you getting frustrated? Try to figure out the situation before the birth of baby or you may get more frustrated after the birth of baby.

Can you point out where I said I was frustrated or that I didn't love my baby?
I think you may be reading into this a little too much.