Why in the hell would she do that?

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clm
Nashville, TN
https://twitter.com/ironclm | http://ironclm.typepad.com

never you mind that dolt, you are absolutely perfect the way you are. and that goes for all of you ladies. just be you and the rest will fall into place.

my two cents,

Preston.

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It's not about the bike, it's just along for the ride.

i just want to clarify and it could mean diddly squat to any of you but i am from a broken home and my mother took me and my father ignored me unless i had money to give him.

my mother is the resaon in which why i am so protective of women and why i respect them so much more than my own gender so i'm not trying to 'hit' on any of you, i just know and respect and connect and adore the opposing sex much more than i do my own as let's face it, guy are phucking chumps. most at least.

i even have the sacred heart with 'MOM' tattoed on my bicep.

that is all,

Preston.

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It's not about the bike, it's just along for the ride.

Oh, he was totally hitting on you. You should ask him if he has any good ideas for some good, hard cardio and if he wants to show you how.

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http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

no, i wasn't hitting on anyone but a nice piece of ass is always appreciated! ha!

hey, i am still a guy.... ;)

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It's not about the bike, it's just along for the ride.

Take him brownies, then drop his a$$ on the next ride, it'll make for a really intense ride for you ;-)

I...adore the opposing sex

That's funny

That's just like my Grandfather!!

I think you should just ignore it for now, and if it happens again, just tell him it's inappropriate for him to give you advice like that and you will train and eat as you see fit.


On the flip side, I ride with a guy who tells me to eat more muffins so I can keep up with him on the downhills!!

Not only was his comment lame and insensitive (I can't bring myself to use the word "inappropriate since the Miss California on Larry King debaucle) but it was moronic too. Raisins are a lousy weight loss food.

OK, as a guy, let me say his advice is the same he'd give to anyone else...if he didn't have a filter.

Here's what's going through his mind most likely "OK, climbing is weight dependent, I remember when I first started I was terrible until I lost weight, now I'm a 'good' climber. This person here could still lose some pounds and it would make them even better! I'll give them some advice like I got/figured out". The difference between him and most guys isn't his line of thinking, it's the filter in between his mind and his mouth.

His advice isn't inherently bad, unless you're dangerously low on body fat, losing excess fat is a great way to be a better climber, the problem is he doesn't get that he's not in a position to talk to you about it. Though to be fair some people are so incredibly egotistical about their body that any criticism, from anyone, will blow their top.

Long story not so short, he's not necessarily an insensitive jerk who needs to be put in his place. He might be a very attentive and sensitive guy who has no idea his "help" is hurting more than it's helping.

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-Andrew Saar
It is better to do the right thing and be paid poorly,
than to do the wrong thing and be rewarded richly.

Nah, the dude was a knob.

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Proud member of the MSF (Maple Syrup Mafia)

Snot rocket or launch a bottle at him.
It is possible that this douche may have been trying to hit on you. He probably talks about cycling to all of the women he meets and says "how fast he is, how great he climbs, etc." Most of these women probably have low self esteem and they say "Wow, I wish I had your dedication. I really need to lose 10 more lbs."
Then BAM - he tells them what he would do and then yada-yada-yada.

Just signed up to this site today and saw this...

Loved some of the replies and others were as equally insulting. Loved the suggestion of the "snot rocket" as I a aussie and never heard that term but the visual image cracked me up.

In Aust the girls sort these types. I agree it is possibly some warped come on line from a guy that hits on perhaps women he assumes have low self esteem.

I have learn't to be quick with the gun from my verbal holster.

Reply 1. " You would be a much better rider if you focused on your cycling instead of the size of my butt"
Reply 2. "Interesting?, but my power to weight ration is perfect.."
Reply 3. "I'm sorry?...are you hitting on me?"
Reply 4. None. Total and complete indifference, no doubt drives men like this berzerk.

Grrrrrrr. I bet you are awesome, and by the way I have run @2.47 marathon and many races and have a decent gluteus maximus so he can go jump....

I like fun trash talking but this is an inappropriate comment. I would have said something like "Yeah, that 10 pounds is why I'm back here in the pack instead of towards the front. What's your excuse?"

2/3 up and he still hadn't dropped you? Maybe the response would be: that's my excuse, what's yours?

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a lot of male cyclists are obsessed with their weight and talk about it like its no big deal. to them losing weight is about increasing performance (increasing power to weight ratio) and so its no big deal to discuss this. might just be a clash of "cultures" so to speak...some cyclists are real serious and find discussion about weight no big deal, some are serious but can get offended if said by a stranger, etc., some are not serious riders and could care less about boosting power to weight. maybe just two people with no common ground on the issue so it creates awkwardness for the poster. if it wasn't clearly malicious i'd ignore it or maybe just toss him a zinger.

Clearly a lack of sensitivity on his part, but why did this comment bother you so? As an older guy, I really don't care what others think of my physical appearance: I am what I am, and if I don't like me, then I will do something about me. Most or all of the guys I know also couldn't care less about what others think and also say about their appearance (except Kevin, who is sensitive about his hair). Even if a stranger (of any gender) were to tell me I'm fat, I'd either acknowledge it as true ("yeah, I haven't been training much lately"), make a joke about it, or ask what their excuse might be for going the same speed.

I ask mainly because I don't like what women take from our cultural environment about body image, and I believe it is in women's power to not take it.

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"Go yell at an M&M"

This is my take on it as well (I'm female, btw). He didn't "call you fat" as the thread title states. He said you'd be a better climber if you lost a few pounds, which is a true statement. Fair enough that it's a bit of a weird thing to come out and say to a stranger out of the blue, but given what you wrote, I don't think he meant it in a negative way at all, and was honestly just trying to be helpful. Talking about zinging the guy for simply being clueless seems very mean and uncalled for, in my opinion.

I'll bet nobody climbs on him, ever.

You want to know why it bothered me?

I go on these group rides for a workout. 90% of the group is men >45. I realize I stick out like a sore thumb, and I just sit quiet and try to pedal. I don't ask, nor want any extra attention.

I endure irritating conversations that center around "The Wife doesn't want me to do this..., The Wife wouldn't like that, ha, The Wife doesn't let me do that!"
I smile nicely and say thanks when I get all sorts of (unprompted) advice about what stem I should buy, or what kind of hill repeats I should do.
I listen politely when I get a 45 minute race report about a 40 minute Masters 55+ Men's B crit. Two dozen old geezers on their litespeeds riding around in circles. Riveting.

But, Mr. MedT, I draw the line when a man, old enough to be my father, who does not know my first name, nor I know his, announces out of the blue, that I would be better off 10 pounds lighter. I would be equally bothered if a woman (at any age) announced the same thing, unprompted, within earshot to a half a dozen others.

I don't like what women "take" from our cultural environment about body image, but I'm sure as hell the root of the problem is what we are provided with, NOT my "womanly power" to not take it.

If all of that bothers you so much, stop riding with them.

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______________________________________
I know I'm promiscuous, but in a classy way

Swift kick to the nuts. This guy wasn't raised right.

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

Based on your posts and particularly your response to Med Tent Man, I'd say you've got more problems than just maybe carrying a few extra pounds. I'd be willing to bet you get offended frequently. Just a hunch. People who are frequently or easily offended usually should spend less time being offended and more looking at why they in particular are offended so much.

And, I've always thought you could take almost any triathlete and have them lose ten pounds and they'd be faster on the bike and definitely the run. Also, I agree with the people who say if you don't like it, don't ride with them. I'm not a fan of group rides for various reasons, so I don't do them.

Nice armchair psychology there, Sofie. You should be proud.

Anyone with half a brain knows that for a vast majority of recreational cyclists a 10# loss would improve climbing performance. Only an asshole would point that out, totally unsolicited in the context the OP described.

Disclosure: I'm a male. If you really want to hit him where it hurts, tell him: "I was thinking about your advise to loose 10 lbs. I'm comfortable with my weight. Are you comfortable being so scronny?"

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