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Request for pratical joke ideas
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Okay, here is the deal. At my yearly Xmas party, a bunch of my riding buddies (all of whom I am faster than btw) took it upon themselves to take my racing bike and totally festoon it with crap. You name it: a basket, a kickstand, a little turtle bell, a big orange flag, the whole nine. It was all in good fun of course and actually quite funny, but the gauntlet has been dropped and I must plot my revenge. I am not much of a jokester though, so I am looking for harmless yet creative ideas. May or may not be bike related. I was, for example, thinking of waiting for one of them (my brother) to go away and then putting a big sign in front of his house reading: "Congratulations Todd on your "BEST IN CLASS" award at US Square Dancing Champs!" or something of the like. This is a creative bunch here, so let 'em fly.





"To give less than your best is to sacrifice the gift." - Pre

MattMizenko.com
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [MattMiz] [ In reply to ]
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You can do what my friends did to me. They got me real drunk and then put me on a bus to wisconson.
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [MattMiz] [ In reply to ]
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I'd put all the crap back on your bike and proceed to drop them on your next ride. "Revenge is a dish best served cold".
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [MattMiz] [ In reply to ]
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If they ride 700c wheels, would it be possible to switch a 700c wheel with a 650c? (no front brakes, but not lethal)

Perhaps you could switch their seat with a huge cruiser or banana-seat?

How about mixing the group a batch of gatorade for the ride but mix it with only 1/4th the suggested water? Or make Tang instead of Gatorade (mmmm....gatorade pudding....almost like a gel except not)

Loosen the seat so it won't stay at the right height.....there are also the classics like signing their e-mail up for every single sweepstakes and casino you can (if you know the right passwords)....ink on the sunglasses frames....grease in the bike gloves.....

I'm just throwing out ideas - they may not necessarily work and I tried to keep them more fun/inconvenience than dangerous.

Best of luck. The problem will be that if they came up with something that clever the first time they've got more up their sleeves.

Peace,

Brother Josh
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [MattMiz] [ In reply to ]
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Along the same ideas of the sign in front of the house....

When your bro goes away, get a century 21 sign, put that out front, and a sold sign over it-love to see his face when he gets home

brush your ass hair with his toothbrush and film it. let him brush with it for a week and then give him the video

a rotten fish in his car
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [MattMiz] [ In reply to ]
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If you don't live together, you could buy some shrimp (ready to eat), and take about 5 out of the bag. Hide the bag (opened) real well in some place warm (attic, heating duct, radiater....) and then randomly place the other shrimp near the bag. Your brother will start to smell the shrimp (as they quickly rot) and then look for the smell, and ideally find one shrimp. The next day after the smell has not gone away, he will look again and hopefully find one, thus thinking the problem is solved. You get the idea....

Ben
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [MattMiz] [ In reply to ]
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The other day my daughter handed me some jelly beans. Being seven, she could barely contain herself as I bit into them. One was spinach, one was dirt, and one was booger flavored. Inspired by Harry Potter I guess. Handing these out during a hard ride could have a good effect.
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [MattMiz] [ In reply to ]
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A couple of bicycle-related ideas:

One trick we played on a friend who was very proud of his shiny new bike was to hang a screw on a long thread down his seatpost. Wrap the thread around the seatpost bolt or something to keep it in place. As he rode it made a clicking noise; the nice thing is it would get worse when he stood to ride up hills and such (the bike would swing back and forth more). This nicely mimics real problems with cranks, bottom brackets, stems, etc. - they sound worse when you stand and hammer.

After he noticed the noise we started offering helpful suggestions: "does it happen when you stand?", "with the right pedal stroke or the left?", "how about when you tug on the bars?", etc. The ride was punctuated by us stopping every 5 miles to try and tighten up his stem, check his spokes, feel the cranks, etc. After an hour or so we started telling him that the only possible cause left was a crack in his frame (remember, this is his first ride on his brand-new bike!). After two hours we finally took pity on him and pulled out the weight. I'll never forget the look on his face...

Supposedly you can get the same effect by placing a ball bearing in the handlebars behind the end plugs.

A trick I've done while riding is to ride up next to (and slightly behind) someone and start chatting with them. After a minute reach over and lightly hold the back of their saddle/bike bag (rear watter bottle cages are great for this) and apply a slight bit of pressure. If you're careful and time it with a slight uphill rise in the road they won't notice it. Slowly increase the pressure you're pulling back on them with; the trick is to do it very gradually and to keep chatting the whole time. Eventually they'll notice and be very upset that they just pulled you up the whole hill. An important point to note is you should only do this with riders you are very comfortable riding in a pack with and you know won't freak out if someone brushes their bike, otherwise you're looking at a not-funny trick when they crash.

Or you could just show up at your next race with all the junk they put on your bike and still beat them.

-J
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [jeffm] [ In reply to ]
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fill the seat tube with bb's and stuff a wad of cotton on top to prevent any sound , amazing how a few extra pounds add to a workout

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"on your Left"
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [eric] [ In reply to ]
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not according to Softride. They seem to think aerodynamics are more important... so maybe you should add a parachute Smile ... a little irony wouldn't hurt.

Joe Moya
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [MattMiz] [ In reply to ]
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This has nothing to do with biking and really proves that I went to a...unique...college, but here goes: Get one of those disposable, 5 gallon, styrofoam coolers (the kind you might find at a convenience store). Add about a gallon of liquid nitrogen (that's the unique part and hardest part to get). Buy several bags of big, cheap balloons. Blow them up and then drop them in the cooler. You may want to use a pump because a whole lot of balloons will fit in that cooler with the temperature that low. Find a decent sized room (bedroom, car, at college it was a dorm, etc.) and dump out the contents of the cooler when no one is around. Walk away. When the balloons head back toward room temperature, they expand again and suddenly a cooler full of frozen balloons fills a 12x12 room about half way to the ceiling. No one sees a thing. You walk in with a cooler, you walk out with a cooler fifteen seconds later.
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [MattMiz] [ In reply to ]
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Matt,

Not bike related either but a really good joke. Place a classified ad for each of the buddies with each of their respective phone numbers. The ad should read something like this,"For sale: Play girl magazines, every issue from 1980-2000. We can talk about the price." They will get calls for a week or so from a variety of people.



Daniel
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [textrirunner] [ In reply to ]
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Thanks for the ideas one and all - these are very good and very funny. Knowing that after I fire the return volley there will probably be many more, it is good to have as many arrows in the quiver as I can get.





"To give less than your best is to sacrifice the gift." - Pre

MattMizenko.com
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [MattMiz] [ In reply to ]
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Mash a bunch of Limburger cheese all up under their saddle and out of sight. Let's just say it gets a tad fragrant.

When I ride w/ the guys a lot younger than me, and they are feeling their oats, I have an opportune route w/ a big dog under the porch who responds well to a whistle - of course I am the only one fully prepared for the required rapid acceleration.

Have fun....

David
* Ironman for Life! (Blog) * IM Everyday Hero Video * Daggett Shuler Law *
Disclaimer: I have personal and professional relationships with many athletes, vendors, and organizations in the triathlon world.
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [david] [ In reply to ]
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Next time you drop them on a ride, pull over and loosen your rear brake. When they catch-up make all the fuss about just not having it that day, and then "discover" the problem.
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Re: Request for pratical joke ideas [Chappy] [ In reply to ]
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1. Banana in tire / tube (funny)

2. Put frame pump under water and pump up tires (VERY funny)

3. Nut tied to string and placed inside the seat post.

4. Contact cement on seat (be ready to replace the seat and shorts)

5. Lead weights in water bottle.

6. Put jingle bells in a flat tube, patch it and install

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?
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