Login required to started new threads

Login required to post replies

Smart watch w/ insults
Quote | Reply
I like my Garmin's "achievements" just fine, but I think the market could use a watch that motivates you with insults (or at least makes you laugh). Things like:

A fat kid could run faster than this
You swim like a cat
That wattage wouldn't power a lamp

What else ya got?

maybe she's born with it, maybe it's chlorine
Fishtwitch is chlorintined!
disclaimer: PhD not MD
Last edited by: Dr. Tigerchik: Sep 5, 20 16:34
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ negative reinforcement [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Actually in negative reinforcement, a behavior is strengthened by a removal of negative outcome.

Edit: so the watch would have to insult you continuously until you did things correctly.
Last edited by: jaretj: Sep 5, 20 16:35
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ negative reinforcement [jaretj] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
you're right. I changed it.

maybe she's born with it, maybe it's chlorine
Fishtwitch is chlorintined!
disclaimer: PhD not MD
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Dr. Tigerchik wrote:
I like my Garmin's "achievements" just fine, but I think the market could use a watch that motivates you with insults (or at least makes you laugh).

CARROT Fit on an Apple Watch
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Dr. Tigerchik wrote:
I like my Garmin's "achievements" just fine, but I think the market could use a watch that motivates you with insults (or at least makes you laugh). Things like:

A fat kid could run faster than this
You swim like a cat
That wattage wouldn't power a lamp

What else ya got?

My Garmin gives me insults like "Unproductive" and "Performance -2, -5, -15 (yes -15)." I felt insulted, but agreed.

https://www.strava.com/...tes/zachary_mckinney
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [plant_based] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
"Your saddle is too low".
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [mcalista] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
"you should've gotten a bike fit"
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
My neighbour bought the nike smart watch, he kept it by the computer until he kept getting messages like 'are we running today?'. And 'its been a while, going outside?'. He literally gave it away to a nephew...
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [mcalista] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
mcalista wrote:
"Your saddle is too low".

Your crank is too long
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [plant_based] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
I think the Garmin ‘recovery’ suggestions can be insulting enough. After a century ride, my buddy‘s computer said that he take 21 days to recover.
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [sathomasga] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
sathomasga wrote:

CARROT Fit on an Apple Watch

I’ve had Carrot Weather for a few years. THis would be so good if it linked in with GARMIN activities too

Trust me I’m a doctor!
Well, I have a PhD :-)
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [beston] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Quote:
I think the Garmin ‘recovery’ suggestions can be insulting enough.

My reaction to those is often "I'll show you!"

I thought of another one - "your resting heart rate is high, you should train more"

maybe she's born with it, maybe it's chlorine
Fishtwitch is chlorintined!
disclaimer: PhD not MD
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Dr. Tigerchik wrote:
Quote:
I think the Garmin ‘recovery’ suggestions can be insulting enough.

My reaction to those is often "I'll show you!"

I thought of another one - "your resting heart rate is high, you should train more"

For sure. I looked at my watch after a hard workout suggesting 48 hours rest and said out loud “I’ll give you 24”.
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [DFW_Tri] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
I have the Don Rickles signature model but I'm upgrading to the latest Sam Kinison release - it just screams at you when you slow down.

"Aquabike is a swim then sleep session on aerobars ...."
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
"Speed was obviously not the goal today"
"Ladies and Gentleman, the sloth of the sea"
"It's okay if you're too afraid to remove your training wheels"
"Were your brakes rubbing the whole ride?"
"At least you didn't drown."
"I could understand this pace if you were running uphill the whole way"






Take a short break from ST and read my blog:
http://tri-banter.blogspot.com/
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
My 920XT has an annoying habit of giving me the "MOVE!" alert right after finishing a ride or run...

"I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 10, and I don't know why!"
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
"Was that you? or your kid!"

or

"Now you've finished the warmup....."

or

"Is that it?"

or

"HTFU buttercup"
Last edited by: michael Hatch: Sep 7, 20 6:43
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [plant_based] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Performance goes down to -15? Ouch. I know when I'm running slow, I'd rather not quantify it that way.
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
I think the recovery estimates it gives when I go out for a little jog after a break from training and my HR is around 170, and by the end of it, the watch tells me I need 3 days off to get over a 6k jog, is a great passive aggressive insult.

Maybe it's the English side of me.

It could add in a

'thought you'd retired'
or a
'shall I call an ambulance'

message on to it.

Feel the Speed
Last edited by: FtStri: Sep 7, 20 13:49
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
I get annoyed at the gentle-but-condescending "we need to talk" messages that Garmin sends me.

Because Garmin apparently can't figure out by my activity uploads that I'M ON MY DAMN BIKE LIKE 8 HOURS EVERY SATURDAY. That's why I have fewer "steps."


Last edited by: trail: Sep 7, 20 13:52
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Is it that short for your wife?
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
https://forum.slowtwitch.com/forum/Slowtwitch_Forums_C1/Triathlon_Forum_F1/%22Pace-Shaming%22_P7255220/

"Isn't RandMart the old punk rock dude who had the crazy ex? Then this post checks out"

Stop-Think-Consider-Do
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Warbird] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Warbird wrote:
My 920XT has an annoying habit of giving me the "MOVE!" alert right after finishing a ride or run...

This !!
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [Dr. Tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
My watch would be subtle. You know like moms are:

"You know, you could have just left me home for this workout"
"It's been a while since you've taken me for a workout. Have you been using your Apple Watch?"
"Do you thing that eating that pizza before that run was a good idea? You seemed a bit tired."
"Well, you did your best...right?"
"I blame myself, really. I made yo feel like you need to take me on all of your workouts."
"Why do you set your pace alarms? You're going to do what you want anyway."
"You should probably take a day off from training...but it's really not my business."
"Why do you only wear me for workouts? I'm sorry if I'm so embarrassing to you."
"Wow, that was your fastest 5K run time! You're soooo important now."

Kiwami Tri
Insta
Facebook
Quote Reply
Re: Smart watch w/ insults [AKCrafty] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply


"Isn't RandMart the old punk rock dude who had the crazy ex? Then this post checks out"

Stop-Think-Consider-Do
Quote Reply