AutomaticJack wrote:
My "kids" are 29 and 32, both off on successful lives on their own. A few years ago at a wedding my son made the comment that we had been "free range" parents and it seemed to work where other styles didn't. The people they were talking to had been carefully supervised for a good portion of their lives - who they hung out with, curfews, bed time requirements, church every Sunday, things like that. My wife and I just taught the kids right and wrong and turned them loose at a young age.
After all the "I can't believe that" and "that's horrible parenting" comments he pointed out that...
They didn't do drugs or smoke, there were no grand children in the picture, they had both finished school and college with no problems, and they were both out on their own in secure jobs and healthy relationships - something that many in that group could not claim. They even still get along with us.
Call it luck if you want, but your example of how you live life means far more than your words, and the music you listen to means absolutely nothing, although my son does like that death metal shit that I can't stand. I would much rather listen to 70's on 7 or Hair Nation.
Although my kids are not that old (Oldest is 22) we were kind of the same. I know we use to get looks and comments from other parents on our "lack of parenting".
My kids never had a curfew, They would tell me where there were going, and if it got "late" they would usually fire off a text to say when they thought they would be home. Middle kid would even text if the changed and went to someone else's house or out to eat or something, never asked them to.
I had a parenting philosophy of diminishing control, and figured by the time they got to H.S. they were who they were and and changing that was going to be hard. Let them fail early and at a young age, when the consequence's are not has high.
Never told them to do there homework, or study. All three got good grades (2 amazingly so, the last one had a c in freshman year, but finally started getting things together this yr junior yr and got all A's)
Just Triing
Triathlete since 9:56:39 AM EST Aug 20, 2006.
Be kind English is my 2nd language. My primary language is Dave it's a unique evolution of English.