I'm a stay at home dad, my wife would travel a lot for work and we have two kids. One issue is when the parent who goes away, the other parent develops a routine that doesn't need the other parent since they are not around.
So, when you come back for those 14 days, don't just start changing things or going back to how things were. Ask what role you need to fill once you come back. Does that mean doing everything and your wife get's to be on "chore vacation"?
Can your wife and kids come out to see you for their vacation time while you still work? Can she work remotely at all?

No direct experience, I am an electrician by trade and have looked at it.

Basically in Canada as a skilled trade you can look at 150k$ per year for 14/14 rotation (assuming 14 12 hour shifts) or about double (75k$) what a normal journeyman would make in my town.

A lot of my friends have done stints (HVAC, millwright, elec etc) up north, and to be honest most of them are idiots, ie coming home with a jacked up F350 for 100k$...never putting the extra income to good use.

I spent 12 years working for the best (tourist) passenger rail company on the planet, in the summers I would have to ride the train, but basically spend 100-120 nights in hotel rooms in Vancouver/Banff/Jasper.

I worked no less than 2500 hours a year, but at the end hated being away. Good money and no regrets but I had to move on.

I am now in facilities which offers the best opportunities in terms of challenge, good wage/benefits but usually home at night and only getting emergency calls 1-2 times per week. Keep in mind that no two camps are created equal, some are awesome with great gyms and food, others not so much.

Also consider your peer group and fellow camp workers, I have heard horror stories about some of the people you might be working with.

Maurice

Is this a temporary situation? For how long? If permanent, is there a long term plan for everyone to move to LA ?
How old are your kids? Is your wife in totally in favor, or does she have any reservations (even a little?)

I did a year+ of splitting time between DC and NY. Usually in NY Mon-Thurs, and home Fri-Sun.

For me, kids were in elementary school and missing the day/day (hw, sports, etc.) every week was harder than expected (for them and me). I would think being away for routinely for14days straight would be difficult if your kids are elementary school age or younger. It's the small day/day stuff that gets missed, in addition to "bigger" stuff like recitals etc. I think it would be easier for HS kids as they have their own schedules and independence now.

For us, when long term plans to move to NY changed, the bouncing back and forth wasn't sustainable for me/us. I can't imagine splitting time between LA/FL would work out long term. Although you would build up a ton of frequent miles benefits.

That's some of my experience with it. But YMMV (literally). I do know others' that seem to be doing sustained biz travel going on for years now.

I just had a conversation with my adult kids this past weekend, about how much time I was gone while they were growing up, and how it impacted them.

My job takes me on the road about 3-4 days per week for about 40 weeks each year. On the days when I am in town, I am generally able to work from home and am around the house a lot. My kids were grateful for the the resources my job has provided and the help it has given them as they start their adult lives. Particularly, as they buy homes, have kids, etc. However, they all have memories of me not being around for events that were important to them. They also commented how having dinner together as a family was a rarity. While I have a very good relationship with my kids, they are much closer to my wife.

Probably, the biggest challenge was being gone and everyone was in a routine without me...then I come home and the routine is changed for a few days...then repeat.

A supportive spouse is critical.

With the benefit of hindsight, I would choose the same career, but definitely try to structure my career in a way that gave me more time at home, even if it reduced my income.

Good luck with your decision.

I have a neighbor who is a pilot and he has a similar schedule. He is either always home with the kids or he is never home. I don't know how they do it but they seem to make it work. It also helps that his wife works for the school district so she has off each summer and can shuttle the kids around or take random vacations at anytime in the summer.

When I asked him about it one of the key things he keeps in mind is it is quality time with the family. He doesn't go to the gym or happy hour with the guys or anything when he is home he is full time dad & husband.

What would your work set up be while gone? Would you be able to FaceTime at reasonable hours?

I don’t travel a lot- but man what a game changer FaceTime is.

I can chat with my daughter every night and she can show me her homework etc. I have read bedtime stories over FaceTime (I’m the mom). She loves to get a “tour” of my hotel room on FaceTime.

I work with a lot of people who make it work.

That said I took a pretty big pay cut to cut back to part time and limited travel.

A friend of mine travels the world for work. He has a rule that he gets 8:00 - 8:10 (or whatever it is) with his kids every night before bed, regardless. He's walked out of high profile sales meetings that he was running for this and told them that its a deal breaker.

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-----------------------------Baron Von Speedypants
-----------------------------RunTraining articles here:
http://forum.slowtwitch.com/...runtraining;#1612485

A lot depends on your kids ages. When my children were very young I traveled 50%. I was home a week and gone a week. Initially it wasn't bad and the kids were okay but getting ready to start the 2nd year my son, 4 at the time asked me, if I loved them because I was always gone. I had to explain to him what I did and why. He was 4 and I'm sure didn't understand. I did that job for 2 more years until I found something better.

My wife and I were ok during this time but when I stopped that job and went to another one where I was home every night we grated on each other's nerves. Spent a good year in counseling.

The most important part is when you're home, you are there.

FWIW, that was over 18 years ago and I've now been married over 30 years. The toughest stretch we had was when that job was over.

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TEAM HD
Each day is what you make of it so make it the best day possible.

I just worked opposite shifts from my wife for 6 - 8 months. And that made it seem like we never saw each other.

This just seems like it is begging for problems. Brings to mind what my wife's grandmother said to her in regards to me, "You take care of him or someone else will."

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I'm beginning to think that we are much more fucked than I thought.

You'll have to have an honest discussion with your wife. While your gone, everything will fall on her. When you are home, how will that work? As somebody else mentioned, they'll develop a routine that doesn't include you. When you are home, where will you fit in? Their routine will have to change and that can cause a lot of stress.

How strong is your marriage? If there is any tension in your marriage this may rip things apart. How much do you want to be away? Answer that very honestly. If you don't mind the idea of missing some of the day to day stresses with the kids / home / wife, that should tell you something.

Understand the stress that it's going to put on your wife and kids. If the kids are sick, she doesn't have a back up. If the car breaks down, she has to deal with it on her own, etc. She'll be a single parent more than half the time.

Be realistic about your schedule. If you are working for 14 days straight, then you leave the next day (the first of your 14 days off) you'll have 12 days before you have to leave home and return to work. Is that enough time at home? Can you reasonably work 14 days, then travel home and have 12 days at home, then travel back and work another 14 days? If you can keep that up, then great, but it could be exhausting. When you are home, I assume that your wife will be working, so you'll have weekends together. How much can you cram in to that time?

It could work and the benefit could be worth the stress, but only you and your wife can answer those things honestly.

Just my 2 cents worth.

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How does Danny Hart sit down with balls that big?

I know someone who did this, moved from a well-paying position in Michigan to a "make your eyes boggle" income out West. He started coming home less and less over time, eventually hardly at all. And then he got a divorce, because he still had that ol' biological need to put the dipstick in the hole, if ya know what I mean, and knocked someone up. It was an ugly divorce, losing custody of his kid, eventually giving up custody altogether, losing his shirt in the process and going broke. The girl he knocked up, eventually had a live-in situation with her, but as those situations go with an "other woman" they also eventually had a nasty break up. Fast forward through a few years of personal hell for him, a coming to Jesus of sorts, he's back on his feet, again making F-you money, and has a kick-ass marriage.

That's probably an extreme, but my point is you could go out there and make a lot of money & pay off your house in 5 years. But it's also 5 years where you'd be putting a lot of extra emotional responsibility on your spouse (read: building up resentment toward you from them) and losing a lot of precious time with the people you love the most. You can always build your income up more where you're at, find other jobs or side gigs that stoke your emotional fire even if it's volunteer work, but there's no possible way you can earn enough to make it worth losing time with your kids and spouse.

At least this is my mindset. And it's 100% the reason why I've learned to find contentment being very comfortable financially, but holding back from moving into another position where I could absolutely make more money but take on more responsibility, stress, and time away. I could go somewhere else within the month and make more money, but as it is I have a lot of flexibility, don't bring stress home when I log off, can help out at my kid's school when they need it, work from home if they're sick or have snow days, etc. I've never lived away from the family and worked, but I was in a position that had a commute, plus travel, plus hobbies that took me away constantly and, believe me, it's just not worth it. Don't make your kids wonder where you're at & why you're not with them, for any amount of money.

I don't know a single person who left their family for higher income and said it was a good idea, later in life.

Your kids grow up quickly and paying off a mortgage faster just won't make up for losing that.

If the money is that good, and something you really want and your family is good with it, move them with you.

I'm speculating about the exact numbers but I was away at least 5 of 7 days a week from Jan to Sept last year with two kids under four

For me, it made no difference but there is no question my wife was screwed

We live overseas, I worked in a third country and my wife had no support making it a huge workload whilst I was working / hanging out with friends.

We would do it again, but not as
Medium or long term plan

Most here have already touched on them, but I think the following are key:

1. Spousal approval and support. With support going both ways. Also, if your spouse is home with the kids for 14 straight days, he or she will also need some personal time when you're back home.

2. Routine. Can the family maintain the same or similar routine when you're home as when you're away, with perhaps some changes in who does what.

3. Quality time. You'll need to set aside some significant, quality time with the family as a whole as well as individually with your spouse and each kid. Camping with the family, one-on-one time with each kid for outings, etc., regular date nights with the spouse.

4. Daily contact when you're away. Facetime/skype. Scanning in the kids' homework so that you can help.

Been there, done that. I commuted from LA to Detroit for 2.5 years before moving the family.

It will definitely affect your home life.

And the time change + travel.....that 14/14 becomes 16/12 because the back-n-forth travel is exhausting. And you'll get sick more often. Are they paying for the travel costs/housing in LA?

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"There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old's life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs." John Rogers

Whats more important the $$ or the time with your family. Decide and act accordingly. Never understood why people try to make life more complex then the simple decisions it typically comes down to.

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Just Triing
Triathlete since 9:56:39 AM EST Aug 20, 2006.
Be kind English is my 2nd language. My primary language is Dave it's a unique evolution of English.

I think this brings up a good point of - What is your end game?

I have seen people do things like this with a specific end game in sight and everyone bought in and had it work out really well.

If you can pay off your house earlier, what does that do for you?

How do you get the family back together full time? This is where I see a lot of people stumble. The goal is to do something for three years but then they get stuck because there is no good path back (although this is more people taking their families with them for an ex-pat job and promising to be back in x years but at that point there is no opening for them to come back to.)

You just brought up an old memory. When I started working nearly 30 yrs ago the company that hired me did the Franklin planner thing. One of the exercises was to write what you wanted on your tombstone, I forgot about that exercise for many many years (at the time I was a newlywed Double income no kids) was having a bit of life crisis and I came across that paperwork. I had written something like Great Dad (this was before I even had kids) But those many years later I realized I had made my life decisions around that goal. I may not have been the most financially successful or taken my kids to Disney (ever) but I made all their school plays and other things. I had a job I could leave in the middle of the day if I needed went to many of their in school plays and things that most working parents miss.

I think Life for a lot of people gets hard, when they forget or don't have an end goal. And don't take this as preachy or anything, everyone has there own goals and compass. Just figure out what yours is and follow it.

So in the end.. WHAT DO YOU WANT ON YOUR TOMBSTONE?

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Just Triing
Triathlete since 9:56:39 AM EST Aug 20, 2006.
Be kind English is my 2nd language. My primary language is Dave it's a unique evolution of English.

What about job security on either one? Getting laid off sucks.

Thanks all for the input.

The wife and I have been going round and round ( in a constructive way) about the time spent away and, ultimately, we both agreed that the strain of separation would be too great for this job to be anything more than a few years. I'm going to stick it out here and make the best of the job. As others have said, I don't want to miss a thing while the kids are so young (all are under ten).

Fly In / Fly Out is common in the mining industry in Australia. I have been working FIFO for 25 years now. I have worked 14/7, 9/5, 8/6 and am currently working 28/14. The 28/14 sucks. I would love an even time roster like your 14/14.

FIFO has worked well for me and my family. My oldest daughter works FIFO.

My suggestions are

• Phone every night at the same time. Now with video chat it almost feels like you are home.
• If your kids are young take some of their favourite books with you, read them a story each night.
• When you are home maximise your time with the family. Walk the kids to and from school. Volunteer at the school. Take the kids to soccer practice/dancing lessons/etc.
• Spend time, without the kids, with your partner when you are home.
• Try and help out with the chores as much as possible when you are home.
• Don't waste the additional income, pay off your house, get some investments. Don't waste it on expensive toys and holidays.
• Be aware of your mental health. Depression rates are high amongst FIFO workers in Australia.
• Being away for important dates like Christmas, birthdays, etc is really tough. I avoid social media around these dates.