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Thanksgiving issue, need some help from the wise women
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I have a social etiquette question.

Last year, my brother and his girlfriend spent Thanksgiving at GF's parents' house in Washington. I was invited too, which was very generous of them and it was an excellent break from school. We were there Wed. evening through Sunday morning.

This year, brother + girlfriend are going camping/rock climbing for Thanksgiving. GF's parents still invited me for Thanksgiving, even though brother and GF won't be there. Again, I am really grateful to be included.

Last year, they invited me for the weekend, presumably because brother/gf would be there that whole time. This year, my invite was on a group email invite. I RSVP'ed yes, thank you for including me, can't wait. I found out today that my Wed. PM class is cancelled, so I emailed to ask if I could please drive up Wed. and spend the night. I figured this would probably be okay, as it's a bit of a drive. GF's mom email back that this indeed would be fine.

Because I am brilliant, I didn't realize until after that what would probably make more sense is to drive that morning, spend Thanksgiving night, drive back the next day.
Do you think it's okay to email back and ask if I might switch my plans and do that instead? I don't want to be a nuisance and it's always slightly awkward inviting oneself over, though GF's parents are very relaxed, really nice, and understanding of the "college kid away from home" thing.

Thanks... this social stuff stresses me out, I am like a Sheldon and find it all very hard to understand :-)

Proud member of Fishtwitch and the ST Grammar Police
disclaimer: PhD not MD
Last edited by: tigerchik: Nov 11, 13 17:53
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Re: Thanksgiving issue, need some help from the wise women [tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
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All good! Honest mistake that makes it easier on them (less hosting) and you, so just be cheerful and honest.

Or, you can always blame a test/friend/imaginary friend and say you need to do X, Y, or Z and need to push back, but be grateful for their hosting.

Remember that they invited you, so you aren't a nuisance. You're a welcome guest. But bring a nice little hostess gift (candle/potpourri/flowers/chocolates).

I'm so glad you have people to be with!

<3,

AC

(EDIT: this from someone who grew up worshiping the "All Holy Martha Stewart" as goddess of etiquette)


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Last edited by: Agilecipher: Nov 11, 13 19:33
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Re: Thanksgiving issue, need some help from the wise women [tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
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Just one opinion, but I think it would be totally fine to call/email and say something similar to what you stated here: "I hate to be a bother or inconvenience, but my addled gradschool brain go to thinking and oops,I realized it is probably better if I drive up Thursday and just stay the one night. I sure hope this doesn't cause any trouble. I feel so lucky to be included in your Holiday plans and so look forward to coming! What can I bring to help with the enjoyment of the day?"

Or something that feels like you! Sounds like they are chill people and will totally understand! And if they don't you are welcome here (if I remember right you are at Oregon State!!)!!

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Re: Thanksgiving issue, need some help from the wise women [tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
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Plus staying over on Thursday gives you extra time to help clean up! You could say that all dishwashing is your treat. That would make my holiday to hear that.
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