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"Festive Attire"
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Hi all - this is my first venture into The Womens, and I think I'll get much better feedback here than in the LR. My wife and I got invited to an engagement party at a swanky restaurant here in NYC. It's for a couple with whom we're pretty good friends, however they aren't the ones throwing the party (being hosted by some of their other friends). The invitation says it's "festive attire," which I can't imagine means it's an ugly sweater party. My thought is a suit and potentially no tie, but I'm at a bit of a loss. What exactly do they mean? The invite also says "no gifts," which throws another wrinkle into the equation.

Thanks!
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Re: "Festive Attire" [KenyonTri] [ In reply to ]
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If it says no gift, don't bring one, they don't need anything. If you can't stand going empty handed, make a donation in their name to a charity, non-religious and non-political of course.

Festive means dressy. I'd bring the tie and if no one is wearing one you can take it off. Better to be prepared. She needs a great dress but it doesn't need to be formal. No ball gown necessary :-)

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Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce
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Re: "Festive Attire" [KenyonTri] [ In reply to ]
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Dress as santa and mrs claus. Leave the gift bag at home.
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Re: "Festive Attire" [JenHS] [ In reply to ]
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"festive" doesn't mean green and red or something of the like?

maybe she's born with it, maybe it's chlorine
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Re: "Festive Attire" [tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
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In my opinion, festive is would not be NOT holiday-themed, tacky sweater, red/green, etc. Especially at a swanky restaurant in New York. Festive attire is slightly nicer than cocktail attire (which may or may not help you). I think the suit without a tie is great- classy and it doesn't look like you're going to work. I would presume your date will wear a short, cute but formal, dress?
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Re: "Festive Attire" [Lilac J] [ In reply to ]
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This is really interesting. Festive = seasonal, happy, brightly colored Santa/reindeer/snowman that sort of thing.

That's what it means in Maine ;-)

maybe she's born with it, maybe it's chlorine
If you're injured and need some sympathy, PM me and I'm very happy to write back.
disclaimer: PhD not MD
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Re: "Festive Attire" [KenyonTri] [ In reply to ]
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festive attire is applied to the engagement party, not the holiday season. According to your post it sounds like you will need to look young, stylish, cool, and put together....like the couple, right? but... it would help to know the following:

What is the name of the swanky restaurant in the city? or which neighborhood is it located? age group? ("when in Rome")

You are probably good with what you are going to wear, you'll need at least a suit jacket.
Bring at least a card for the couple. (throw a gift card to crate and barrel in there as a small gesture, if you are really close to the couple)
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Re: "Festive Attire" [KenyonTri] [ In reply to ]
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Black suit with black (or really dark colored) shirt. No tie (necessarily) required. So hot & definitely meets the swanky restaurant needs.


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I know I'm promiscuous, but in a classy way
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Re: "Festive Attire" [D!] [ In reply to ]
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Agree with D!...in NYC just go with black and you'll be safe. Black suit and jacket with a nonwhite shirt for you (no tie) and black dress/pants suit for her possibly with some fun standout jewelry.

If the invite says no gift then don't bring anything. Always love the idea of donating to a charity that's important to them though if you really want to do something.


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Re: "Festive Attire" [suwanne] [ In reply to ]
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They rented out the Inoteca in Gramercy (a bit cooler than my hood in Queens). Age group is late 20s/early 30s, lawyers & bankers. I'm thinking dark gray suit with a purple gingham shirt, no tie.
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Re: "Festive Attire" [tigerchik] [ In reply to ]
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In Reply To:
This is really interesting. Festive = seasonal, happy, brightly colored Santa/reindeer/snowman that sort of thing.

That's what it means in Maine ;-)

That's definitely not what it means in NY. Agree about the tie. Wear one but take it off if everyone else is sans tie. I'd say it's cocktail attire with a little zip (not black!)

clm

clm
Nashville, TN
https://twitter.com/ironclm | http://ironclm.typepad.com
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Re: "Festive Attire" [KenyonTri] [ In reply to ]
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Cocktail attire + a card and/or bottle of wine would be perfect!

To me festive does not imply tie, so I think you're fine without. For your wife, a cocktail dress w/ fun accessories.
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Re: "Festive Attire" [KenyonTri] [ In reply to ]
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NYC festive attire is dressy - and a black cocktail dress would be just fine for your wife. again it is NYC - not bumbfuck, USA. Black ALWAYS appropriate in The City.
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Re: "Festive Attire" [KenyonTri] [ In reply to ]
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Ahh.. now it makes sense... "festive attire" aka "be ready to drink and toast all night!" ;)
Sweet spot for the party (havent been there in a couple of years, but the drinks flow easily there). Good choice of attire. I think the black thing can be a bit much. Men with color added to the wardrobe sends a confident message. I am sure your wife will look good in a dress or whatever she chooses to wear.
Have a great time!
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Re: "Festive Attire" [KenyonTri] [ In reply to ]
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Did you think about calling the "friend" and asking what they meant by festive? You WERE invited by them, they arent going to bite your head off for asking a pretty simple question... Or calling the restaurant?
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Re: "Festive Attire" [brikins13] [ In reply to ]
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Couldn't really call the restaurant...they rented out the whole place so I think it's kind of at the hosts' discretion. And we actually weren't invited by our friends, but by their friends who are throwing the party. Who we don't know, or have names/phone #/email for.
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Re: "Festive Attire" [KenyonTri] [ In reply to ]
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Engagement party - Traditionally no gifts as is the party to announce an engagement. I don't get why people have suggested gifts of any type, when the invite specifically stated "no gifts". The rules or suggested rules are there for a reason even if you do not agree with why they have chosen to create the rule.

It is a party for their engagement in a venue that has been rented by friends. Sounds like the friends are trying to do something special for the couple and want the guests to put an effort into how they dress. Sounds like you have done just that and will be great.



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Re: "Festive Attire" [KenyonTri] [ In reply to ]
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Figured if you got an invite, there was some form of RSVP, unless it was through word of mouth or whatever... oh well- would the restaurant have their #?
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Re: "Festive Attire" [NorthShore] [ In reply to ]
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In Reply To:
Engagement party - Traditionally no gifts as is the party to announce an engagement. I don't get why people have suggested gifts of any type, when the invite specifically stated "no gifts". The rules or suggested rules are there for a reason even if you do not agree with why they have chosen to create the rule.


x2. Since the invitation specifically said "no gifts," I would think it downright rude to show up with a bottle of wine, or even a gift card. A "Congratulations" card would be fine. If you are VERY close with the honorees of the party that you feel you must get them a gift, do so at another time than this party.
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Re: "Festive Attire" [KenyonTri] [ In reply to ]
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You know you're going to have to post photos afterwards, right?

clm

clm
Nashville, TN
https://twitter.com/ironclm | http://ironclm.typepad.com
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Re: "Festive Attire" [trackie clm] [ In reply to ]
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Duly noted
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