Login required to started new threads

Login required to post replies

Prev Next
New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant.
Quote | Reply
Hi,

I'm new here but am a triathlete for many years and I value some of STer's opinions. I need some help from a womens point of view and hope someone can shed some light on this for me.

I am a man going through a divorce, my wife asked for a divorce due to unreconcilible differences, I am also seeing a women now for over 3 months and we are very in love. My new gf is also going through a divorce, however, she has not filed yet for divorce and does not currently live in the same state as me as of yet. Come summer she will move to my town, she says. We just see each other every 4 to 10 days when she comes to my town for work. She works in my town but lives out of state.

She asked me to pay for a boob job for her and I agreed. However, when we got to the plastic surgeons office for the consultation and to plan the date I got cold feet and told her that I could not pay for this right now because of my divorce and how this could effect my soon to be ex wife and my custody of my children and I can not jeapardize my custody situation if me soon to be ex found out about this.

My new GF got very upset with me and says she cannot rely on me and does not trust what I say anymore. In addition, to many other hurtful comments. I feel very upset and horrible. I told her that I would pay for the surgery, just not before my divorce is final, which is on June 2nd. I asked her to plan it for June instead of April or May. She still is not okay with that and says, "what if your divorce is not final by then, then what? I cannot go on that."

Plus, the procedure is much more than I thought and would have funded 5K not 15K, which included a tummy tuck as well, which I also somewhat agreed to. She is not a gold digger, she is actual very rich (her soon to be ex is rich - not her), I am the one who really cannot afford it.

Am I a complete fool? Should I feel bad about this and am I wrong? Is this too much to ask from her? What should I do? Should I expect this from her? Is this a forgiveable thing I did?

Thanks,

Larry
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
run

like

hell






sorry man...


<If you're gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough>
Get Fitter!
Proud member of the Smartasscrew, MONSTER CLUB
Get your FIX today?
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Khai] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
In Reply To:
run

like

hell






sorry man...
x2
Last edited by: YarnYoda: Mar 24, 09 9:04
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Khai] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
So I should not feel bad about this?
Last edited by: Larry12: Mar 24, 09 9:04
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Is this a joke?

why on earth would you do this? get far far away from her NOW.
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [slink] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
This is no joke !! I am just very in love and would do ANYTHING for her. And it's not about the money, I've lost more money on lawyers, homes, etc. At least this I can have fun with them. I know I am a fool too. But it's not about the money with me.
Last edited by: Larry12: Mar 24, 09 9:09
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
You can feel bad about if you want to. But you'll feel a hell of a lot worse if you let this continue.


Get out NOW, while your commitments to this new woman are still minimal (purely emotional).


<If you're gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough>
Get Fitter!
Proud member of the Smartasscrew, MONSTER CLUB
Get your FIX today?
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Khai] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Why should I get out of it with her? When she gets over this disappointment with me, everything "should" get back to normal again. We have spoke about marriage as well and living together, so why would I leave?
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Run. Run far, run fast, run like Mexican water in an American tourist, but most importantly RUN.


There is no justice, there is only me. -- Death
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
In Reply To:
Why should I get out of it with her? When she gets over this disappointment with me, everything "should" get back to normal again. We have spoke about marriage as well and living together, so why would I leave?
This has officially become the worst troll ever.


______________________________________
I know I'm promiscuous, but in a classy way
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Sabrekitty] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Why does everyone say "run"..... I don't want to run.
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
In Reply To:
Why does everyone say "run"..... I don't want to run.

Don't run then. Stay, and "enjoy the ride".

Much like my advice to you however, I'm pulling the plug here.


<If you're gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough>
Get Fitter!
Proud member of the Smartasscrew, MONSTER CLUB
Get your FIX today?
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [D!] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
I am not a troll..... I just need some help.

I am in love and wouldn't anyone do this for their loved one or spouse? It's just money, if I bought her an engagement ring it would cost about the same. Plus, she did say she'd rather have a boob job and a small wedding band. This is no joke.... just very strange to someone else looking in. I just need to advice, please.
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
You wanna pay the ticket, you can take the ride. If you're so blind you can't tell if you're getting into the Love Canal or the House of Horrors and don't want to listen to those of us that can, then it's your lookout.


Have fun.


There is no justice, there is only me. -- Death
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Sabrekitty] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Tell me why this is the House of Horrors? I thought I was the one to blame, the jerk that went back on my word, etc. Not her. Okay maybe she expected a little too much too soon. Plus, to make matters worse in your eyes, this is her 3rd boob job and she is a beautiful black women that I care about and hopefully will stay together a for long time.
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
I am also seeing a women now for over 3 months

She asked me to pay for a boob job for her

GF got very upset with me and says she cannot rely on me and does not trust what I say anymore

She still is not okay with that

My friend, take it from an old guy who has been around the block a few times: dump her as fast as you can. If she is having this sort of reaction now over something this minor, can you imagine what it will be like further down the road? There are plenty of other fish in the sea

Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [squid] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
So this is minor? So if she cannot drop it, I should drop her? I just imagined what you said, she is a drama queen and can start to make a mountain out of a mole hill very easily in the past.
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
she is testing you in a most psycho-woman way. This is just the first thing and if she is throwing out hurtful comments now over just a boob job (of which she has had 2 before) then you are in for a rough, rough ride. There will be other times when you won't be able to do what she asks (that is the nature of relationships, compromise means sometimes one partner doesn't quite get what they want) - how is she going to cope with that? And how long will you be willing to degrade yourself by putting up with the abuse? I would extricate yourself out of this one ASAP. Why the hell won't she pay for the job herself?
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [cherelli] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
In Reply To:
she is testing you in a most psycho-woman way. This is just the first thing and if she is throwing out hurtful comments now over just a boob job (of which she has had 2 before) then you are in for a rough, rough ride. There will be other times when you won't be able to do what she asks (that is the nature of relationships, compromise means sometimes one partner doesn't quite get what they want) - how is she going to cope with that? And how long will you be willing to degrade yourself by putting up with the abuse? I would extricate yourself out of this one ASAP. Why the hell won't she pay for the job herself?

Because she does not have the money herself and does not want her "very rich" husband to pay for them (he would pay too - he's 10x worse then me). However, she did say that she would make him pay for them and not me. And said NOW that I'm off the hook and that she never should of asked me in the first place and that she did this to herself.

But yet, BLASTED me into kingdom come and said such hurtful things that "sorry" and great sex cannot undo fully at this time. Do I have to be afraid if I stay or will this get better?
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
I can't imagine being in a long distance relationship with a women for only 3 months and her asking me to pay for her boob job. (Actually, I can't imagine any woman asking me to pay for their boob job.) Maybe dropping her is bit premature at this point, but this sets off a bunch of red flags. For all you know, you could pay for her boob job and then she dumps you. It will be interesting to see what she does if you stand your ground and refuse to do it. Or maybe propose this compromise:you'll pay for her boob job once she's divorced and has moved to your town.
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [cherelli] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Let say for instance; you were my gf, what would have you said, done to me in this situation?
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Plus, to make matters worse in your eyes, this is her 3rd boob job and she is a beautiful black women that I care about and hopefully will stay together a for long time.

3rd boob job......LOL...congratulations! you suckered me in. I can usually spot a troll a mile away. Good one, dude.........

Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [squid] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
In Reply To:
I can't imagine being in a long distance relationship with a women for only 3 months and her asking me to pay for her boob job. (Actually, I can't imagine any woman asking me to pay for their boob job.) Maybe dropping her is bit premature at this point, but this sets off a bunch of red flags. For all you know, you could pay for her boob job and then she dumps you. It will be interesting to see what she does if you stand your ground and refuse to do it. Or maybe propose this compromise:you'll pay for her boob job once she's divorced and has moved to your town.

I did say that originally, but she said, - "how can you give a gift with strings attached?" "I spend thousands of dollars a month to see you and travel hundreds of miles and never ask of anything in return" So I said okay, I'll just get them for you - no strings attached, I trust you and that your intentions are pure.
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [squid] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Everything is not always black and white. To the outsider looking in, this is completely f ed up. But it's all 100% true. I just need some help. Plus, why would I go to a triathlon forum to air this out? Unless of course, I am a triathlete that comes here alot and values some of the opinions here. This forum is much better than Craigslist, much more intelligent responses.
Quote Reply
Re: New GF wants me to pay for a breast implant. [Larry12] [ In reply to ]
Quote | Reply
Larry,
You are going through a divorce and starting a new relationship. My question is...what's the hurry? It's quite possible this is a rebound relationship that may not last although I know it doesn't feel like it now. I would advise you to take your time with this woman and develop this relationship SLOWLY. Once you are both officially divorced and you have all your "ducks in a row" in terms of your kids and such - take a look at this request of hers again.
She's made it this far in life with the boobs she's got. She'll last a while longer with the body she has.

I went through a divorce almost 4 years ago - had a weird and exciting short term relationship with a man during my divorce. I was obsessed with this man. Fortunately, he was more sensible than me and he knew I was on the rebound. A year later, I met another man and we have been together 2 years - it's wonderful and it's a normal relationship.

Hope this helps. And good luck.
Quote Reply

Prev Next