A story for you:
When I was younger, and a burgeoning biologist, I found it incredibly hard for me to relate to others around me. Through undergrad, I was one of the lone wolf types who wasn't in our biology major as a pre-med student. No one "got" me. Let alone boys. I was at the point in life where I couldn't imagine my life without a biology career, but I was just missing that personal part of the equation, with someone to share this passion.
After graduation, I dated a bunch of guys who were smart, but didn't get biology, let alone research (they were all engineer types who were plug-and-chug application, not R&D). I was frustrated that they didn't understand my passion for research, my odd work hours, etc. I swore I needed to find someone out there just like me.
And then, I did. And it was MISERY.
Our hours never aligned well enough when we wanted/needed to be with each other to develop our relationship into something healthy. And then on top of that relationship stressor, it became competitive. He got his result faster. He disagreed with my methodology. He started mansplaining things I had been doing, and had been published on, years before meeting him. He only valued me as a partner if I was having a successful run in my laboratory, but the caveat to that was only if *he* was also in a successful phase. The relationship ended, in a fiery DTMFA situation, and it almost drove me mad.
And then, almost by accident, I met my husband. IT guy, knew nothing of biology outside of birds and bees stuff. He championed me through my PhD program. He supported me as I supported him and his career, even though my IT knowledge is limited to "turning it off and turning it back on". What attracted me to him was his sense of humor, his compassion, and the fact that he can cook a mean salmon en croute. We're still living happily ever after, 11 years after meeting and almost 9 years of marriage.
The end.
OH, and ps- I started my triathlon obsession about 4 years into our marriage. He needs to be led to the gym by the ear. But he's the best damn sherpa this side of the Atlantic.
Level II USAT Coach | Level 3 USAC Coach | NASM-CPT
Team Zoot | Tailwind Trailblazer
I can tell you why you're sick, I just can't write you an Rx
When I was younger, and a burgeoning biologist, I found it incredibly hard for me to relate to others around me. Through undergrad, I was one of the lone wolf types who wasn't in our biology major as a pre-med student. No one "got" me. Let alone boys. I was at the point in life where I couldn't imagine my life without a biology career, but I was just missing that personal part of the equation, with someone to share this passion.
After graduation, I dated a bunch of guys who were smart, but didn't get biology, let alone research (they were all engineer types who were plug-and-chug application, not R&D). I was frustrated that they didn't understand my passion for research, my odd work hours, etc. I swore I needed to find someone out there just like me.
And then, I did. And it was MISERY.
Our hours never aligned well enough when we wanted/needed to be with each other to develop our relationship into something healthy. And then on top of that relationship stressor, it became competitive. He got his result faster. He disagreed with my methodology. He started mansplaining things I had been doing, and had been published on, years before meeting him. He only valued me as a partner if I was having a successful run in my laboratory, but the caveat to that was only if *he* was also in a successful phase. The relationship ended, in a fiery DTMFA situation, and it almost drove me mad.
And then, almost by accident, I met my husband. IT guy, knew nothing of biology outside of birds and bees stuff. He championed me through my PhD program. He supported me as I supported him and his career, even though my IT knowledge is limited to "turning it off and turning it back on". What attracted me to him was his sense of humor, his compassion, and the fact that he can cook a mean salmon en croute. We're still living happily ever after, 11 years after meeting and almost 9 years of marriage.
The end.
OH, and ps- I started my triathlon obsession about 4 years into our marriage. He needs to be led to the gym by the ear. But he's the best damn sherpa this side of the Atlantic.
Level II USAT Coach | Level 3 USAC Coach | NASM-CPT
Team Zoot | Tailwind Trailblazer
I can tell you why you're sick, I just can't write you an Rx
Last edited by:
Dr_Cupcake: Jul 17, 19 5:35