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Re: Ask Me Anything: Debut Win & 8:10 Course Record at IMMT! [Scotttriguy]
Scotttriguy wrote:
Congrats and all that on executing your race plan mo bro. As a fellow (past) MSCer, its been great to witness your ascension, and live a bit vicariously through your racing.


Curious about your 'perfectionist tendencies' and how that fits with how you think / feel prepping, during and after a race.

Many folks with perfectionism are either not self-aware of that aspect, or are too fearful to admit aloud, let alone publicly, often denying it with some variation of "I'm not a perfectionist, that would be a flaw."

So, for you, what's the most challenging part of changing / managing your perfectionism tendencies?

If a race goes well, like IMMT, how does how your thinking / feeling differ, if at all, from races that don't go as planned?

How did you reward yourself, if at all, after IMMT?


I'm well aware that perfectionism is a double-edged sword. On one hand, it's driven me to most of the accomplishments that I'm most proud of. On the other hand, it's also made my life quite unpleasant at times, negatively motivated me through a fear of failure and caused me to struggled with an "all or nothing" mentality. When I was younger and less self-aware, my perfectionism ran rampant as a student. Before sports were the outlet they are now for me, I poured myself into my university studies with a compulsive intensity. I was top of my class every year, but I graduated as a burnt out insomniac with a borderline eating disorder, anxiety and no social life!

I wrote a two part piece on my blog a few years ago on my development and the role that perfectionism has played, both good and bad. The story is framed by a comparison with my sister, who obviously share much of my neural circuitry, but is very different in some ways. The second part is more about perfectionism. It's the most deeply personal writing I've shared.

The Jock, the Nerd & Lady Luck (Part I)
The Perfectionist & the Elephant in the Room (Part II)

Here's a relevant excerpt from the conclusion:

"Perfectionism may be esteemed by some, but I am too familiar with its ugly side. In a sense, perfectionism is like hyperactive delay of gratification; you never really allow yourself the satisfaction of a job well done, ever fixing your eye on a greater prize. . . .


. . . . my decision to race as a professional triathlete may not strike you as the best course of action for a recovering perfectionist. I beg to differ. Triathlon certainly rewards discipline and attention to detail, but training and racing are exercises in mitigating the suboptimal, the unforeseen and the uncontrollable; in effect, a perfectionist’s worst nightmare.


There is a clear distinction between behaviour that optimizes performance—grounded in reason and forethought—and behaviour fueled by compulsion. I still struggle to choose the former and override the latter, but my progress since graduating has been heartening. My journey in triathlon is helping me learn to control perfectionism and not let it control me."

The satisfaction of executing a plan I've been working towards for years with near perfection is all the reward I need. All the positive attention, a $20k+ payday and the new opportunities have opened up are an added bonus.

I'm not too hard on myself after disappointing races anymore. I have a 24 hour pouting policy. That means that for 24 hours after the race, I allow myself to fully experience the depths of whatever emotions I have. After that, it's no more pouting and on with life.

Scotttriguy wrote:
And another question / comment about your training: for the most part, you seem to design your own training plans, not unlike Lionel. But a lot of folks on ST are criticizing Lionel for his self-coaching approach.

So it would seem the top 2 guys at IMMT are mostly self-coached, yet you're getting praised on and Lionel is getting pissed on for similar approaches. People are funny.

So my question - and it may relate to the perfectionist questions above, or not - is why are you taking this approach to designing your training? Why are you not giving yourself completely over to a coach?



David Tilbury-Davis did coach me completely over the first few years of my pro career. I only took back the reigns last year. I really needed his leadership as I was getting over some personal challenges; recovering from overtraining, low testosterone and related issues; and still learning so much about the sport. I've always enjoyed having a hand in directing my process, but I recognized that I had fucked up and needed someone else to steer the ship. In effect, I fired myself as the captain! After a few years, I felt as though I'd matured and learned enough as an athlete to avoid past mistakes with continued oversight and reality checking from David. Both then and now, our coach-athlete relationship has always been a dialogue, not a dictatorial "my way or the highway" approach.

I'm fascinated by sports science and coaching and love nothing more than experimenting on myself. I also like that I can take risks that most coaches wouldn't be comfortable taking with their athletes. I think my training is pretty sensible (due to David's influence!), but I also have some relatively extreme practices, such as several 50k run days in this block and full marathon, up to 9 runs a week, 6 hour trainer rides, etc. I think that taking the lead may have put me on a faster trajectory to a performance like IMMT, though probably a rockier one than if I'd let a world class coach like David take full control!

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Last edited by: Cody Beals: Sep 5, 18 15:55

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  • Post edited by Cody Beals (Dawson Saddle) on Sep 5, 18 15:55