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Re: sucker punched (venting/long) [kbee]
I took in every persons comment on this thread and have very much appreciated all the input I've received (it's helped tremendously)....but your comment stung...which made me look twice at it. I'm a firm believer that it's the things that 'sting' that you need to take a second glance at because usually there is truth behind it.

You are absolutely right, this is NOT about me and because of my frustration I was allowing the bitterness my family is carrying towards me to make it about me. But in all honesty, you are 100% right on. They are all going through a horrible horrible reality right now. Although I do hope that my BIL is sentenced to the fullest amount possible (due to his incredible lack of remorse; praying that the 'time' will help the walls he has built up come down and he gets the help he needs)....at the same time I can only imagine what is going through my sister-in-law's head, her childrens', her husbands'. Their entire world was just turned upside down and inside out and their reality will take a permanent shift.

So, with that said, I've come to terms with my frustration over the situation and I feel at peace more and more now. The unsettled feeling that something wasn't right was confirmed by a jury when they found him guilty. That brings me peace, knowing that when my heart is saying something to me - I need to listen up. My husband and I have protected our children and honestly that is all we ever wanted.

It is not my job to throw the gavel down in judgment. That is up to a judge. It is my job to put out as much positive energy regardless how they have reacted towards our decision. If they don't ever want anything more to do with me, I'm ok with that, and feel so without any bitterness. I know that we made the right decision. I can not control how they react to that decision BUT I can control how I react to them. My plan is to do so in the shadows, not casting any stones, and show nothing but love towards them - in thoughts and speech, and actions.

Thanks for making me take a second glance everyone....especially you Brick.

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Life is Short...Run Long
Last edited by: RunMomRun: Apr 2, 09 8:04

Edit Log:

  • Post edited by RunMomRun (Cloudburst Summit) on Apr 2, 09 8:04