cutting is eating disorders' cousin. i have/had some intense control issues twinned with self-hatred, so i can sympathize with you folks.
it was worst when i was living on the street, and then in a group home, when i was 17. sometimes i would have 10 cutting sessions per week, with 20-30 cuts per session. i was going to high school at the time and i would go to the washroom during class and cut then go back and just bleed onto my napsack which was black. nobody ever approached me about it, which was probably good, but it was definitely a strange time.
i no longer cut, but the desire is always there. i had a relapse last december during exams, though, and couldn't go to the pool for about two weeks (thankfully i didn't have to coach at the time). that was a bit aggravating.
i also get comments sometimes at races or at the pool - "what happened to your arms and legs?"
i just kind of laugh and say that i was a crazy kid.
i don't have any silver bullet as to how to deal with control issues like this as all i tend to do is keep myself busy enough to avoid them.
in any event, good luck to you guys and gals who deal with eating disorders. finding councilors or psychiatrists who can help you deal with the problems is probably the best path for you.
it was worst when i was living on the street, and then in a group home, when i was 17. sometimes i would have 10 cutting sessions per week, with 20-30 cuts per session. i was going to high school at the time and i would go to the washroom during class and cut then go back and just bleed onto my napsack which was black. nobody ever approached me about it, which was probably good, but it was definitely a strange time.
i no longer cut, but the desire is always there. i had a relapse last december during exams, though, and couldn't go to the pool for about two weeks (thankfully i didn't have to coach at the time). that was a bit aggravating.
i also get comments sometimes at races or at the pool - "what happened to your arms and legs?"
i just kind of laugh and say that i was a crazy kid.
i don't have any silver bullet as to how to deal with control issues like this as all i tend to do is keep myself busy enough to avoid them.
in any event, good luck to you guys and gals who deal with eating disorders. finding councilors or psychiatrists who can help you deal with the problems is probably the best path for you.