Dear Speedo Corporation:
Every 4 years, I find myself, like the child awaiting Christmas morning, the opening of the men's Olympic swimming trials, and of course, the Games itself. As a very active individual, my life takes a decided turn to couch potatoville in order to watch the action unfold over the next several weeks. is it the blazing times, the world records, the absolute power and ease at which these men perform in the water at incredible speed? of course, and while these are compelling reasons to view, it's not my personal reason.
you see, water sports conglomerate, for me, your average 43 year old American female, it's reallly about the opportunity to watch hot, 20 something year old men with chiseled abs and rippled arms and supple shoulders glistening with chlorinated dewiness, strutting about the pool deck. in short, for many of us females, it's pure and simple swimmer porn. and it really doesn't get much better than the Olympic Trials, well, until this year. yes, dear manufacturer of high-tech aquatic apparel, your "LZR" suit is destroying my ability to enjoy the meet. the simple problem is that, while this "LZR" suit maybe the fastest invention in swimming history and responsible for a gagillion world records since it's inception, the darn thing covers the ENTIRE male body (except the for the neck and some hint of shoulders.)
WTF? who thought THIS would be a good idea, because I can tell you, on behalf of the female viewing audience, it's really a huge design disaster. (personally, i think you should consider firing the designer (and i'm guessing it was a male) of this atrocity. where ARE your priorities?). in case you haven't gotten the picture yet, let me explain in it the briefest terms possible: we want to see Brendan, Aaron, Michael, Ryan, et al unencumbered of this hideous fugly black contraption covering those lovely abs and chests and shoulders. for all that is good and holy, those poor boys worked darned hard for those bodies, and i demand my right to ogle them while slobbering into my Chardonnay!!!
so, Speedo, perhaps you could only supply those "tights" version of the suit for the rest of the week, and in Beijing as well. those are much more acceptable and provide the visual stimulation we ladies desire. or better yet, by Beijing, perhaps you could get rid of that nasty black and silver fabric for something a little more, tasteful. perhaps something like a nice see-though shade of clear? (and maybe put some of that on the butt panels too while you're at it). otherwise, i can pretty much state that the female viewing population of the Olympic swimming events will fall drastically, and you will have no one but yourselves to blame. (i just praise the lord that this LZR travesty was invented after Lenny retired).
sincerely,
Susan Marston
Boise, ID
Every 4 years, I find myself, like the child awaiting Christmas morning, the opening of the men's Olympic swimming trials, and of course, the Games itself. As a very active individual, my life takes a decided turn to couch potatoville in order to watch the action unfold over the next several weeks. is it the blazing times, the world records, the absolute power and ease at which these men perform in the water at incredible speed? of course, and while these are compelling reasons to view, it's not my personal reason.
you see, water sports conglomerate, for me, your average 43 year old American female, it's reallly about the opportunity to watch hot, 20 something year old men with chiseled abs and rippled arms and supple shoulders glistening with chlorinated dewiness, strutting about the pool deck. in short, for many of us females, it's pure and simple swimmer porn. and it really doesn't get much better than the Olympic Trials, well, until this year. yes, dear manufacturer of high-tech aquatic apparel, your "LZR" suit is destroying my ability to enjoy the meet. the simple problem is that, while this "LZR" suit maybe the fastest invention in swimming history and responsible for a gagillion world records since it's inception, the darn thing covers the ENTIRE male body (except the for the neck and some hint of shoulders.)
WTF? who thought THIS would be a good idea, because I can tell you, on behalf of the female viewing audience, it's really a huge design disaster. (personally, i think you should consider firing the designer (and i'm guessing it was a male) of this atrocity. where ARE your priorities?). in case you haven't gotten the picture yet, let me explain in it the briefest terms possible: we want to see Brendan, Aaron, Michael, Ryan, et al unencumbered of this hideous fugly black contraption covering those lovely abs and chests and shoulders. for all that is good and holy, those poor boys worked darned hard for those bodies, and i demand my right to ogle them while slobbering into my Chardonnay!!!
so, Speedo, perhaps you could only supply those "tights" version of the suit for the rest of the week, and in Beijing as well. those are much more acceptable and provide the visual stimulation we ladies desire. or better yet, by Beijing, perhaps you could get rid of that nasty black and silver fabric for something a little more, tasteful. perhaps something like a nice see-though shade of clear? (and maybe put some of that on the butt panels too while you're at it). otherwise, i can pretty much state that the female viewing population of the Olympic swimming events will fall drastically, and you will have no one but yourselves to blame. (i just praise the lord that this LZR travesty was invented after Lenny retired).
sincerely,
Susan Marston
Boise, ID