LOL! That was actually funny (you just have to be in-the-know).

FWIW, I haven't tried Zipps, but I do have a Jet 9 C2 rear, a Jet 6 C2 front (but not SCT), and a Smart Enve 6 front. To be honest, can't really feel the difference between the front Jet 6 and Smart 6 front in terms of actual speed or crosswind stability (they're both quite easy to handle). So, in terms of aero (whether crosswind or actual full frontal), no scientific data here, but it's a wash.

Handling: the Enve feels stiffer, more solid. It's also lighter. Personally, I think the Jet 6, performance wise, doesn't give up anything on the Enve. Handling wise, the Enve is just a bit better for me. I was also able to get it handbuilt professionally, using [red!] Alchemy ELF hub and [white!] Sapim CX-Ray spokes.

I like the Enve's more. It's also a lot more expensive than Heds. I know this is a Zipp FC vs Enve Smart thread, but I can only c ompare Hed Jets vs Enve, so I hope this isn't too off topic.