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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [IronWidow] [ In reply to ]
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Okay, to get serious for a moment. IronWidow, please have your husband post his side of the story. And then we here at ST will attempt to mediate the matter between you.
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [IronWidow] [ In reply to ]
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Last edited by: M Calarco: Jul 31, 08 15:43
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [TriMike] [ In reply to ]
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In Reply To:
I wonder how many guys out there are praying this isn't their wife?

Seriously this is an issue I have discussed with my SO on many occasions (well except the sex part since...well we are married). My goal is to never (ok...rarely) let training impact family life. I get up at O'dark thirty, go on Sat long rides at 6:00AM and one last thing...never complain how tired you are even when you are dieing. It is just a hobby...never forget that.
Quit trying to absolve your guilt! Ha, ha. I have two young kids and do the same. My long rides for IMLP, I was leaving the house around 5:30am and finishing the workout by lunchtime. Sunday was always my training day off, so I have tried in all 3 of my IM's to minimize the impact to the family, but it required a tightly-choreographed schedule each day. No evening workouts ever for me, which of course my wife loves.

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My business-eBodyboarding.com
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [Fatty] [ In reply to ]
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In Reply To:
Okay, to get serious for a moment. IronWidow, please have your husband post his side of the story. And then we here at ST will attempt to mediate the matter between you.
Mediate?

First we need to determine the validity of the complainant, before we can even begin to assess the impact on their connubial bliss. Who's to say it's not just some random person trying to destroy the equilibrium of the board?

For that matter, maybe it's someone in a very competitive AG, that has a very close rival on the board, and this is a post designed to get their mind off training for that critical period, having them think "Maybe I should forgo that last training session and spend time with the spouse", resulting in a less than competitive IM.

There are implications and repercussions to be considered here, man!! We can't just willynilly start mediating things...that's how government got started!

John



Top notch coaching: Francois and Accelerate3 | Follow on Twitter: LifetimeAthlete |
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [Devlin] [ In reply to ]
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"We can't just willynilly start mediating things"- hahahahaha. This thread is going to be epic!

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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [IRONMOSS] [ In reply to ]
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The famous Sergio thread just took a backseat to this one. I'm envisioning record-breaking views and replies.
Maybe this is The Sergio's way of trying to get us to forget about that thread...


______________________________________
I know I'm promiscuous, but in a classy way
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [Devlin] [ In reply to ]
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it seems to me that the simply fact that it bothers one spouse makes it "valid".
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [TriBodyboarder] [ In reply to ]
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I just try to _minimize_ the impact on the family.

Getting up at 0dark30 means going to bed early. The kids are asleep
but the Iron Sherpa is not. I'm also crankier at night.

I workout in the mornings, but also try to go at lunch for the second
workout of the day (when they are called for).

Missed several workouts on vacation.

There are still sacrifices. I remind the IronSherpa that she
has the job she wanted. I'm not sure I can say the same but
I do it anyway.

It's training or my liver. I choose training and do whatever I can
to minimize the impact. IM is selfish. I don't want her to have
to pay too high a price, so I won't make her get the tattoo. ;)

-Jot
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [M Calarco] [ In reply to ]
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I've been able to use the time we would have spent on vacation to do all the chores that need doing around here, because you're too busy to help out anymore. Working, cooking a nutritious dinner every night, keeping the house clean and in good repair, paying the bills, showing up at all the kids' activities, and hiring babysitters so I can at least go out with the girls keeps me busy. And it keeps my mind off the fact that an Ironman is too busy and tired for sex.


No sympathy here. I'm the Ironwoman at my house. Not only do I do all my training first thing in the morning b/c it would be completely untolerated for me to be gone in the evenings with church, swim lessons (kids), t-ball and such, but I also have to do all the above mentioned (except the going out with the girls stuff;no time for that) stuff on my own b/c my husband won't help. Before you go bitching try doing all that and training on top of it with absolutely no support. Compared to a lot of people you have it pretty good.




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I have failed at many things, but never in my desire to try again.
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [IronWidow] [ In reply to ]
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I know I sound mad. Really, I try not to be. But I feel very taken for granted. Maybe you could think about showing some love for what your Ironman widow puts up with. Maybe your buddies here will have some suggestions. Or maybe they could use some ideas themselves. (You know, I might just be YOUR IronWidow.) Or maybe they'll just feel sorry for you and be glad I'm not their spouse. If so, I hope they can refrain from mentioning it; I'm having a bad day, and I don't think I could take it. Besides, I think I probably speak for most Ironman widows when I say that I AM proud of my Ironman; you are a rare and special kind of person. But you know, so am I. So am I.
If you are posting this here as a way of reaching your husband your marriage needs serious help.

If you registered with ST today and made this your first post just to troll then you need serious help.
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [do140.6] [ In reply to ]
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Just hold back on him until he helps. Smile
Do you wash his clothes? Do his dishes? Cooking? Clean the house?
Sounds like strike time to me.

Dave

Dave Campbell | Facebook | @DaveECampbell | h2ofun@h2ofun.net

Boom Nutrition code 19F4Y3 $5 off 24 pack box | Bionic Runner | PowerCranks | Velotron | Spruzzamist

Lions don't lose sleep worrying about the sheep
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [TriMike] [ In reply to ]
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In Reply To:
I wonder how many guys out there are praying this isn't their wife?[/quote] Or praying that it is.

Brian Stover USAT LII
Accelerate3 Coaching
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [bigRingKing] [ In reply to ]
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yeah something's definitely missing...maybe you just need to give him some oral sex and cook him a nice meal?? just a thought

Robert Flanigan

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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [IronWidow] [ In reply to ]
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I am sure this is not, hopefully, the first time this has been brought up in your relationship. How many people do not realize the amazing things that they have until they have pissed them away by being selfish and self-centered? Obsession and addiction to anything is unhealthy. Good luck in finding a healthy balance in your relationship.



it turns out that our OP is only "mostly" dead........ ElGordo
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [IronWidow] [ In reply to ]
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Sorry for not jumping on the love fest here, but are you serious? What kind of passive-aggressive bullshit is this? If you can't talk to your husband like an adult, your relationship's got bigger problems than his training.
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [IronWidow] [ In reply to ]
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Will you marry me?

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [IronWidow] [ In reply to ]
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I said you and the rug rats could run down the finish line with me. Now get back in the kitchen!
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [MuffinTop] [ In reply to ]
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In Reply To:
Sorry for not jumping on the love fest here, but are you serious? What kind of passive-aggressive bullshit is this? If you can't talk to your husband like an adult, your relationship's got bigger problems than his training.
Okay, good, I see the mediating has begun . . .
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [desert dude] [ In reply to ]
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In Reply To:
I wonder how many guys out there are praying this isn't their wife?[/quote] Or praying that it is.
Good point. All I got out of that message was: "you need to do me more often". If your wife has to bitch about something, you really aren't going to beat that...

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If it's a YMCA pool, the lightning wanders around the locker room naked for an hour, then uses the blow dryer on its junk. -lunchbox
Last edited by: hjghost: Jul 31, 08 16:37
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]
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post 43? You're slipping...

******************************
If I don't, who will? -Me
It's like being bipolar in opinion is a requirement around here. -TripleThreat
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [hjghost] [ In reply to ]
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Okay boys...who ever has heard "you ride that bike more than you ride me" please raise your hand.



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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [IronWidow] [ In reply to ]
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a 6 hour ride will solve all of your problems...but only if it's followed by a 3 hour run on Sunday.

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"I'm going to Green Bay for Brett Favre straight up!" -- Manny Ramirez
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [bigRingKing] [ In reply to ]
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Okay Okay...I cry foul! That is EASILY on par with "I think you should @#$ on her face"....and the hell I got for that.


Bravo.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unkIVvjZc9Y

No that is no OC or RickRoll

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [TriBodyboarder] [ In reply to ]
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Jay,
I hear ya!

My wife and I made peace with my Ironman training after the first one and she usually gives me one "come to Jesus" lecture during the final weeks leading up to the race. I've survived 5 since and it usually works out well. She made a comment one time after a day away on a long ride...
"doing triathlons has become one of the best things about you and I don't want to change that...BUT, remember to balance things out with us".

It helps that I coach two of my kids travelling soccer teams and do all of the practices. That way I am guaranteed to be done with the training before I go home.

what I did to adjust was...
1)get up early and do what i need to in the early morning.
2) run or swim at lunch
3) MAKE SURE I DON'T MISS DINNER AT 6:15 SHARP.
4) ride after everyone goes to bed if i missed the a.m. workout.
5) long ride on Saturdays EARLY
6)long run on Sunday before Church(bonus points for going to church and not falling asleep)
7) give her oral sex and make sure I cook her a good meal...

BTW: thanks for the See's candy, you didn't have to do that!!! A big hit too! One of her friends brings it back to Pa. when she visits California
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Re: Letter from an Ironman widow [Record10Carbon] [ In reply to ]
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Will you marry me?
Huh. Later than I thought you would jump in...

Get hung up at the post office/UPS shipping?



Top notch coaching: Francois and Accelerate3 | Follow on Twitter: LifetimeAthlete |
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