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How do you think he could love swimming if he feels it's something
he needs to do in order to satisfy his father's ambition? You may want to read some basics about motivation, in particular in a child.
First of all WTF, are you kidding? When or where did I ever say something along those lines?
Quote:
So you have a history of conflicts with your son caused by your recurring
dissatisfaction with the way he trains.
Again WTF , I never said dissatisfaction with the way he trains.
All this was about and Sally hit the nail on the head with the situation was a kid loosing goggles. Kids lose shit. The only reason it dawned on me was when he lost them a parent next to me heard us and was laughing about all the goggles her kid has lost. See some of the other people here who have said the same. I am the primary culprit because I had enough old pairs laying around that it was like giving out candy. I never told him it was ok to loose them but never found a way to make the message hit home enough I guess. It was never really a big deal except it always happens at an in opportune moment like a meet. Go ahead and read into that. Well that and I realized how many we've gone through.
I should have ignored your post like the other one that was about parenting. That's not what this is about. The way I wrote some of my posts leave room for your misinterpretation. I'll also take blame for that. If you wanted to help then I'd suggest maybe asking if I knew why he wasn't loving it or why we butted heads instead of drawing your own conclusion first. So let me try and clear that up for you.
Butting heads - he was being a distraction and misbehaving resulting in more then one conversation with him and the coach. It wasn't so much about swimming it was about good vs bad behavior in general. Once he got over that I stopped going to practice. He's a strong headed kid who doesn't want my help with most things. So as much as I'd love him to want my help I try to stay out of it unless he asks. Hence I don't go to practice unless he asks me to.
Not loving swimming right now - the same way he's not loving pretty much anything that doesn't involve video games and or desert. He's a kid. He gets to pick what sports he plays for the most part. Last year he wanted to play lacrosse. Guess what, he wasn't loving that all the time either. Guess what else, that had nothing to do with my ambitions either. Once he commits to something we try to make sure he finishes what he starts.
I'm not trying to hold myself out as a perfect parent. I freely admit to making mistakes with my kids. But again, you are reading into some stuff here that's not there. I grew up swimming year round. I know how much it can suck. At his age I wanted to quit and wanted to quit multiple times when I was young.(there's room there for some Freudian interpretation I'm sure) My mom and coaches wouldn't let me. Swimming got me into a great HS and a scholarship to college. But for the record, the one thing I struggle with him and swimming is if he gets to the point he wants to quit would I let him because he is good at it and more importantly it seems like it's natural for him. But it's not the most fun sport to practice so I am very mindful of how much it can suck. I saw some insane shit with parents and their kids growing up which is why there's been one consistent message for him with swimming, I don't care if you are first or last just give it your best. Same thing carries true with all his sports and activities. So I'm asking you don't call child services on me just yet.
Now please excuse me while I go back to looking for lost goggles.
"I think I've cracked the code. double letters are cheaters except for perfect squares (a, d, i, p and y). So Leddy isn't a cheater... "