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Crazy white women in SUVs
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MattinSF
Feb 13, 06 15:52
Post #1 of 27 (1272 views)
Crazy white women in SUVs
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Went for a ride this weekend with a buddy who just moved to Montclair in Oakland. Montclair is just like Marin, white and wealthy....most of the rest of Oakland is neither white nor wealthy.
Anyway, we ride up a very steep Joachim Miller onto Skyline where we had amazing views of the whole bay area, and then it was down Redwood...a road I'd never ridden before...and around Lake Chabot.
To cut a long story short my buddy ain't too good with a map and we get lost a few times. We pop out in San Leandro.
In San Leandro we had our first encounter with the crazy white woman in the SUV...screaming out the window that I was taking up too much of the road...she was pissed I didn't stop behind a parked car to let her fat Lincoln Navigator driving ass go by...at the next stop light we exchange pleasantries and a few blocks later she buzzes me so close that her wing mirror missed my head by about 3 inches. At the next light I gave her glossy black paint job a good syrupy Gatorade shower.
A little further along...lost again we miss Golf Course Dirve, our turn off to get back on Skyline and end up on MacArthur in West Oakland. 2 spandex clad white dudes on MacArthur on $6000 worth of bikes is not a common sight and we were a little worried.....lets just say for the next 4 miles we were redlining and running every stopsign and light we came to.
Made it back to leafy Montclair safe and sound with the only threats being the ones to our prejudices and misconceptions.
Of course as soon as we were out of the hood we meet second crazy white woman...Range Rover driving, Chanel sunglasses wearing, little yappy dog in the lap while driving BITCH.
She pulls out of her parking spot right in front of us forcing both of us to almost drop our bikes. She then had the nerve to lower her window and ask if we'd scratched her freakin car....bitch was sipping a latte talking on her phone, had a dog in her lap, and wasn't looking where she was going...and was bitching that someone's face might have messed up her paint....she's lucky I was out of Gatorade.
Gimme the boyz in the hood any day. White women in SUVs are dangerous.
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HOPE is a plan that worked. CHANGE is a plan that worked. BELIEVE is a plan that worked.
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last tri in 83
Feb 13, 06 16:44
Post #2 of 27 (1233 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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Matt, ride on the dirt shoulder where you belong and this won't be a problem.
_____________________________________________
Conservative in exile.
TonyV
Feb 13, 06 17:09
Post #3 of 27 (1212 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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Growing up in NY I frequently trained for bike racing on the service roads of the L.I.E, and got razzed a lot by morons, occasionally brushed by them. The beauty was that the service roads were two lane, one way roads. On particularly fierce encounters (knocked off my bike, hit with a baseball bat or garbage, etc.) I would simply chase the morons down, getting in lots of sprint training. After catching up at a traffic light (easy, as they were numerous) I would pull out my trusty Blackburn pump and crack a window or two....this stoppped the laughing, and I would turn aroung and ride back against traffic. Never got caught by the fat "guidos" as they couldn't run fast enough or drive quickly in reverse. Seems pretty dumb now, but at age 15 I was invincible.....
Speckled Hen
Feb 13, 06 23:25
Post #4 of 27 (1101 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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Oh the not so subtle irony of someone in a SUV telling a cyclist he was taking up too much road space!
These type of people are everywhere, stuck so far up their own arseholes that they unable to see anything but themselves.
trio_jeepy
Feb 14, 06 6:03
Post #5 of 27 (1042 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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If you read about the history of the SUV, what's interesting is that it represented a significant turn in the marketing of cars - instead of designing and selling cars that would both have the ability to avoid accidents through agility and awareness, as well as protect occupants in the event of an accident, they decided to switch philosophies and sell to the American consumer the notion that accidents are essentially unavoidable, and if they are you should be sitting in a tank and make sure that the other guy absorbs the brunt of the punishment. Pretty fucking selfish, if you ask me. Especially since those "safe" SUVs have turned out to be not so safe.
Personally, my experience with them is that SUV drivers, at least on the margin, drive less safely, both because they are more difficult to control and because the feeling of invincibility and power reduces the amount of care they exercise on the road. It's a pretty insidious way to sell cars.
Actually, I think the SUV might actually be responsible for the fix the American car industry is in. People make a big deal about the American worker, unions, healthcare (which are all issues), but I think fundamentally the problem is that American car companies do not make cars that people want to buy. If you can't get that part right, then nothing else really matters. During the 90s, when they were minting money on SUVs and accumulating enormous amounts of cash, did they invest in new car technologies, quality, and new ideas? Apparently not, because just put out more behemoth SUVs while the competition was looking forward. I think it's all a damn shame, but mostly the fault of poor management.
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"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security" - Benjamin Franklin
"Don't you see the rest of the country looks upon New York like we're left-wing, communist, Jewish, homosexual pornographers? I think of us that way sometimes and I live here." - Alvy Singer, "Annie Hall"
Helitech
Feb 14, 06 7:12
Post #6 of 27 (996 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs
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I can see a little guy in an SUV < short dick syndrome> OK . but the little Blonde with the cell phone , I see red . Thirty years ago in would put 2 pounds of powdered sugar in the tank ( use a newspaper funnel ) or hammer 3 potatoes up the exhaust.
I almost got hit by a J lo looking bitch, in a Benz doing 50 mph in the parking lot of a grocery store. JUST SMILE -
Its best to avoid any conflict ,
Motherless-bitches I wouldnt piss on if they were on fire. but dont go by me.
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last tri in 83
Feb 14, 06 8:33
Post #7 of 27 (951 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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I wonder if hybrid SUV drivers are nicer.
_____________________________________________
Conservative in exile.
AmyCO
Feb 14, 06 9:10
Post #8 of 27 (923 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [last tri in 83]
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I drive a Lexus RX330, which is a pretty small SUV, and I'm pretty nice. I know I haven't run any cyclists off the road lately.
I have been called a bitch before, but only in the professional context, and there it's viewed as a compliment.
MattinSF
Feb 14, 06 9:17
Post #9 of 27 (909 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [AmyCO]
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My wife drives an SUV and she scares me too!
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HOPE is a plan that worked. CHANGE is a plan that worked. BELIEVE is a plan that worked.
Sparticus
Feb 14, 06 9:24
Post #10 of 27 (896 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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The Only close calls I have had and only accidents I have had are (in order):
1. FAT, Ciggerette smoking, white woman.
2. Redneck in a pickup truck (complete with "Cowboy Up" bumpersticker)
3. Redneck in a muscle car (Complete with "Dale Earnhart" or some other "NASCAR" bumpersticker.
4. White woman in a SUV - usually either eating, on the phone or putting on makeup.
5. White woman in a Mercedes or Lexus - usually on the phone
6. Mini-van that has some sort of "God" bumpersticker on it.
Never been harrased or had a close call with a low rider, purple caddie, VW, etc.
MattinSF
Feb 14, 06 9:31
Post #11 of 27 (885 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [Sparticus]
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You forgot the #1 hazard on the road.
Daddy's little princess. The 17 year old cheerleader in the BMW M3 doing 100mph on the freeway with one finger on the steering wheel while yakking on the phone.
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HOPE is a plan that worked. CHANGE is a plan that worked. BELIEVE is a plan that worked.
kittycat
Feb 14, 06 9:35
Post #12 of 27 (880 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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most people driving are dumbasses, it ain't just the white women. at any given time you'll come across young kids doing idiot young kid shit, the ADD Blackberry addicts, women who have nothing better to do but yap on the phone, old folks who can't see a damn thing, stoners, drunk drivers, assholes, psychopaths, you name it, they're on the road.
squid
Feb 14, 06 10:16
Post #13 of 27 (844 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [Helitech]
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[reply] < short dick syndrome> OK . .[/reply]
I always thought that was the pick up truck guys that never use their trucks for work.
Chuck M
Feb 14, 06 12:08
Post #14 of 27 (777 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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Thats why, as I age, I do more and more of my training on a mountain bike in the woods or rail-trail type trails. Just not worth the risk on the roads.
AmyCO
Feb 14, 06 13:35
Post #15 of 27 (728 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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SANTA MONICA, California (AP) -- Actress Shannen Doherty complained of pain after a car crash that sent another driver to the hospital, Los Angeles County sheriff's deputies said.
The former "Charmed" and "Beverly Hills 90210" star was driving a Range Rover, trying to make a left turn onto Pacific Coast Highway at 10:17 a.m. Monday when she collided with a Ford Mustang driven by James Warren Paul, Lt. Steve Wilson said Tuesday.
Paul was taken by ambulance to an area hospital, Wilson said. The hospital did not have a record of Paul and Wilson said he didn't know the extent of Paul's injuries.
Doherty, 34, complained of pain after the crash, but declined treatment, he said.
Investigators listed Doherty as "the party most at fault," he added.
last tri in 83
Feb 14, 06 14:13
Post #16 of 27 (703 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [Sparticus]
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you forgot rice rocket racer with the air foil on back.
_____________________________________________
Conservative in exile.
Xenu
Feb 14, 06 14:27
Post #17 of 27 (693 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [Sparticus]
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White woman, cell phone, black BMW 740iL.
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"You'll find a slight squeeze on the hooter an excellent safety precaution, Miss Scrumptious."
"I can live with doubt and uncertainty and not knowing. I think it is much more interesting to live not knowing than to have answers that might be wrong." -- Richard Feynman
Sparticus
Feb 14, 06 14:42
Post #18 of 27 (687 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [last tri in 83]
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you forgot rice rocket racer with the air foil on back.
Oh yeah -- I forgot about that one !!!!
But - I had MORE close calls with minivans with Jesus stickers almost running me over. It was only once that I almost got in a fight with a motorcycle gang.
Ironmom1
Feb 15, 06 5:57
Post #19 of 27 (566 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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You need to watch Pink's video "Stupid Girls" - I saw it last weekend while riding the trainer. Funny shots of exactly what you describe - woman w/chanel sunglasses, the latte, dog in lap etc. Not so funny when it is in real life...
kittycat
Feb 15, 06 6:10
Post #20 of 27 (563 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [AmyCO]
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Amy, i don't know about you, but i would love to bitch slap shannon doherty. she is such a slutish tramp.
(on a sidenote: are you ready for your mary? coming up this weekend, right???)
5280
Feb 15, 06 13:05
Post #21 of 27 (464 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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apparently the problem is you live to close to a bunch of white rich people
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Erik
Feb 15, 06 14:59
Post #22 of 27 (420 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [kittycat]
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most people driving are dumbasses, it ain't just the white women. at any given time you'll come across young kids doing idiot young kid shit, the ADD Blackberry addicts, women who have nothing better to do but yap on the phone, old folks who can't see a damn thing, stoners, drunk drivers, assholes, psychopaths, you name it, they're on the road.
reminds me of that secretary in Farris Bueller's day off.
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cerveloguy
Feb 15, 06 20:29
Post #23 of 27 (379 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [MattinSF]
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That's the big difference between soccer mom's in mini-vans and soccer mom's in SUV's. The mini-van moms will at least apologize for running you over.
"OK, I'll admit I screwed up the facts"
last tri in 83
Feb 15, 06 21:08
Post #24 of 27 (369 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [5280]
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it's a self-loathing thing...
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Conservative in exile.
sphere
Feb 16, 06 8:55
Post #25 of 27 (318 views)
Re: Crazy white women in SUVs [Sparticus]
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The closest call I've had was being intentionally run off the road (there was no shoulder but a large water-filled ditch opposite the white line) while running the white line against traffic by a woman in a SUV. Eye contact made prior to her moving TOWARD me, followed by a life-saving dive into the ditch. I didn't turn fast enough to catch the license plate, but I did spot at least 6 "I care" magnetic ribbons on the back of her tailgate. Cancer patients, overseas troops, lost POW-MIA's, America the Beautiful, etc., but apparently no love for her fellow citizens.
"The nice part about being a pessimist is that you are constantly being either proven right or pleasantly surprised." - George F. Will
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